Ashley Cropper | The Sense Hub

Infidelity can shatter trust and devastate relationships.

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Cheaters often rely on an arsenal of lies to conceal their actions. This list exposes common deceptions used to maintain a facade of faithfulness. If you hear these regularly, it’s time to trust your instincts. Remember, actions speak louder than words. Don’t let smooth talk override clear warning signs.

1. “We’re just friends.”

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This classic downplays the emotional or physical connection with another person. It’s used to justify frequent contact, text messages, or meetings. While opposite-sex friendships can be platonic, pay attention to the nature and frequency of interactions. If they’re prioritising this “friend” over you or hiding communications, it’s a red flag.

2. “I’m working late.”

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Extra hours at the office are a convenient cover for illicit rendezvous. While careers sometimes demand overtime, consistent late nights with vague explanations should raise suspicion. If they’re suddenly unavailable during these “work” hours or their stories don’t add up, something may be amiss.

3. “You’re just being paranoid.”

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This manipulative tactic shifts blame onto the suspicious partner. It’s designed to make you doubt your own instincts and observations. Trust your gut feelings. If something feels off, it probably is. Don’t let gaslighting make you question your own sanity.

4. “I need some space.”

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While everyone needs alone time, sudden and unexplained desires for “space” can indicate emotional or physical distance. It might be used to create opportunities for cheating or to process guilt. If coupled with other suspicious behaviour, this excuse warrants closer examination.

5. “My phone battery died.”

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Conveniently dead phones explain away periods of no contact. In today’s connected world, this excuse rarely holds water, especially if it happens frequently. It’s often used to cover time spent with a lover or to avoid getting caught in a lie.

6. “I’m going on a business trip.”

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Work travel provides a perfect alibi for cheaters. It offers unaccounted-for time and distance from a partner. Be wary if these trips increase suddenly, lack verifiable details, or if your partner is unusually secretive about the itinerary.

7. “You’re the only one for me.”

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Overly effusive declarations of love and commitment can be a smokescreen. Cheaters often overcompensate with affection to allay suspicions. While genuine partners express love, constant unprompted assurances might indicate guilt.

8. “I’m not attracted to them at all.”

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This lie attempts to neutralise suspicions about a specific person. It’s often used when a partner questions frequent interactions or apparent chemistry with someone else. Remember, emotional affairs can be just as damaging as physical ones.

9. “I was helping a friend.”

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Altruism becomes a convenient excuse for unexplained absences or odd behaviour. While helping friends is admirable, be cautious if these instances increase or involve the same person repeatedly. Real helping doesn’t require secrecy.

10. “You’re imagining things.”

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This dismissive statement aims to invalidate your concerns. It’s a form of gaslighting that makes you question your own perceptions. Trust your observations. If something seems off, it usually is.

11. “I’m just not in the mood lately.”

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A sudden lack of interest in intimacy can indicate emotional or physical involvement elsewhere. While libidos naturally fluctuate, a persistent and unexplained decrease in physical affection might signal a problem, especially if coupled with other suspicious behaviour.

12. “I’ve been really stressed at work.”

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Stress is a catch-all excuse for moodiness, distraction, or lack of intimacy. While work pressures are real, be wary if this explanation is overused or doesn’t align with observable facts. Real stress usually affects all aspects of life, not just your relationship.

13. “I bumped into them coincidentally.”

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Cheaters often claim chance encounters to explain being spotted with someone. While coincidences happen, frequent “accidental” meetings are unlikely. Be especially cautious if these incidents occur in unlikely places or at odd times.

14. “I’ve always had that perfume/cologne.”

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Unfamiliar scents can be a telltale sign of physical cheating. This lie attempts to normalise new smells. Trust your memory and senses. If you don’t recognise a scent, it’s likely new to your shared environment.

15. “I’m just trying to spice things up.”

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Sudden changes in intimate behaviour might be framed as attempts to improve your relationship. While exploring is healthy, be wary if these new interests seem out of character or align with known preferences of a suspected affair partner.

16. “They’re like family to me.”

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This excuse justifies inappropriate closeness with someone by claiming a familial-like bond. It’s meant to desexualise the relationship and make you feel guilty for suspecting anything. Remember, genuine family-like relationships don’t require secrecy or make partners uncomfortable.

17. “I’ve been thinking about our future.”

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Cheaters might suddenly talk about long-term plans to create a false sense of security. While future planning is positive, be cautious if it’s out of character or seems forced. It might be an attempt to throw you off the scent.

18. “I would never cheat on you.”

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Unprompted and emphatic denials can be red flags. While faithful partners may offer reassurance, constant declarations of fidelity, especially when not questioned, might indicate guilt. Actions speak louder than words. Trust behaviour over empty promises.

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