You don’t need to use tricks or manipulation to get people to like you.
You just need to know how to build real connections with people. That means making them feel appreciated and understood, and doing so isn’t particularly difficult. If you want to win people over and make them realise what a great person you are to have in their lives, here’s how to do it.
1. Show genuine interest in their stories.
People love to feel heard, so when you take the time to ask questions and show interest in someone’s life, it goes a long way. Listening attentively, rather than just waiting for your turn to chime in, builds trust. Nod, make eye contact, and respond thoughtfully to show you’re really engaged. Small gestures of attentiveness make a big impact. Authentic interest creates a foundation for genuine connection.
2. Remember their name and use it.
Remembering someone’s name might seem small, but it makes them feel valued and acknowledged. Using their name in conversation creates a personal connection that feels welcoming. It shows you care enough to remember who they are. People tend to respond warmly when they feel personally recognised. Remembering names is a simple yet powerful way to make a lasting impression.
3. Share a bit of yourself.
Opening up and sharing a little about your own life helps people relate to you. When you’re willing to be slightly vulnerable, it invites other people to feel comfortable sharing, too. It’s a way of saying, “I trust you,” which encourages mutual respect. Balance is key—share enough to connect without overloading the conversation. Building rapport often starts with a small personal connection.
4. Find common ground.
Shared interests or experiences give you a natural foundation to build from. Whether it’s a mutual love for a certain book or a similar career path, finding commonalities creates instant rapport. People feel closer to those who share their passions and viewpoints. The connection feels genuine when you’re both excited about the same thing. Common ground turns casual interactions into meaningful conversations.
5. Give sincere compliments.
A thoughtful, genuine compliment can make someone’s day and shows that you’re paying attention. Recognising a strength, talent, or effort someone has put in lets them know they’re valued. Authentic compliments feel uplifting without feeling forced or flattery-based. Avoid vague praise; instead, focus on something specific you admire. Sincere appreciation helps people feel seen and respected.
6. Be present in the moment.
In a world full of distractions, giving someone your full attention is rare and meaningful. Putting away your phone and focusing entirely on the person you’re with shows respect. It’s a simple gesture that makes people feel prioritised. Genuine attention makes interactions feel deeper and more memorable. Being fully present shows you care about the moment you’re sharing.
7. Show appreciation for their time.
Time is valuable, so acknowledging someone’s effort to spend time with you goes a long way. A simple “thank you for being here” or “I appreciate your time” can make someone feel respected. This recognition shows that you don’t take their presence for granted. Small expressions of gratitude create a welcoming atmosphere. Acknowledging time shows respect for their commitment.
8. Be consistent in your words and actions.
People appreciate knowing they can rely on you, so being consistent helps build trust. When your actions match your words, it shows integrity and makes you someone other people can depend on. Consistency in behaviour shows that you’re trustworthy and authentic. People are more comfortable with those who are stable and reliable. Reliability is a key ingredient in winning people’s confidence.
9. Use humour to lighten the mood.
Laughter creates a relaxed, friendly atmosphere, helping people feel comfortable around you. Sharing a light-hearted moment can ease tension and make conversations feel more enjoyable. You don’t need to be overly funny; just a small bit of humour helps people feel at ease. Laughter can bridge gaps and break down walls between people. When done naturally, humour brings a sense of warmth to interactions.
10. Show empathy in conversations.
When people share their thoughts or struggles, responding with empathy shows you genuinely care. Validating their feelings lets them know they’re understood, creating a safe space to be open. Phrases like “I get why you feel that way” can make a big difference. Empathy deepens connections and builds trust. People are drawn to those who make them feel safe and understood.
11. Be open to learning from them.
Everyone has something to teach, and showing openness to learning from other people makes them feel valued. Asking for advice or insights shows you respect their knowledge and experience. People appreciate feeling that their opinions matter. When you’re open to learning, it encourages a sense of collaboration and respect. Humility and curiosity are qualities that make people feel comfortable and respected.
12. Follow up on past conversations.
Bringing up something they mentioned previously, like an event or project, shows that you listen and remember. It demonstrates that you care about what’s happening in their life. Asking how things went or expressing interest builds continuity in your connection. Small follow-ups show that you genuinely value the conversation. People appreciate knowing that their words matter and are remembered.
13. Admit when you’re wrong.
Owning up to your mistakes takes humility and shows respect for everyone around you. Admitting fault without making excuses tells people you value honesty over saving face. This kind of openness is refreshing and creates mutual respect. Apologising sincerely shows that you’re willing to grow. People are more likely to trust you when they see you’re accountable for your actions.
14. Be encouraging without expecting anything in return.
Offering support or encouragement, even without knowing if you’ll get anything back, shows selflessness. People respond well to those who genuinely want to see them succeed. Cheer them on and celebrate their successes with no hidden agenda. Encouragement without strings attached makes people feel safe around you. It shows that you genuinely care about their happiness and growth.