Not everyone is going to like you in life — that’s just how it goes.
What’s that old saying? “If you were everyone’s cup of tea, you’d be a mug”? Basically, just as you’re not all that crazy about everyone you meet, not everyone is going to gel with you, and that’s perfectly okay. However, it can get a bit awkward when you have to spend time with someone who’s clearly not your biggest fan. However, we’re all adults here, and it’s possible to be cordial and kind even if you’re not best friends. Here’s how to deal with the situation calmly and maturely.
1. Stay calm and don’t react.
When someone’s being hostile, the easiest thing is to just react, but that’s only going to add fuel to the fire. If you can stay calm, you’ve got control of the situation, and you’re the one keeping your emotions in check. Responding with a bit of composure is a pretty mature move, and it shows you’re not letting their words get to you. In the end, people who try to get a rise out of you will stop when they see it’s not working. Just take a deep breath, and remember — your peace of mind is way more important than an immediate reaction.
2. Be confident about setting boundaries.
Setting boundaries is more than just saying “no” to people; it’s about looking after yourself and your mental health. If you make it clear where you stand, you send the message that you’re not going to tolerate disrespect or bad behaviour. Sure, people might try to push those boundaries, but as long as you stick to your guns, they’ll get the hint. Setting boundaries doesn’t make you rude — it makes you someone who knows their worth. You deserve respect, and that means making sure no one crosses the line.
3. Keep a very healthy distance.
Sometimes, the best way to deal with negativity is by keeping a bit of distance. If someone doesn’t like you or makes you feel uncomfortable, it’s perfectly fine to step back a little. That way, you’re not putting yourself in the line of fire for no reason. Of course, you can’t always avoid them entirely, especially if you work together or have mutual friends, but carving out some space for yourself helps you keep your cool. You’re not ignoring the issue; you’re protecting your own energy.
4. Focus on yourself and your own goals.
Constantly worrying about what other people think can get in the way of your own growth. Instead of letting someone’s opinion hold you back, redirect your focus to what you’re building for yourself. Whether it’s smashing your work goals, working on personal growth, or investing in your relationships, focusing on your own journey helps drown out the noise. When you’re confident in your path, you won’t feel as affected by their negativity. Keep doing you, and you’ll see their opinions matter less and less.
5. Be polite, but don’t overextend yourself.
It’s important to stay polite, even when someone’s giving you a hard time, but that doesn’t mean you have to get stuck in long, drawn-out conversations. A quick, courteous response is all you really need. If someone’s trying to provoke you or drag you into unnecessary drama, keeping things short and sweet will let them know you’re not interested in playing their game. That doesn’t mean being rude — it means keeping things civil without getting caught up in the nonsense. Sometimes less really is more when it comes to handling negativity.
6. Don’t take it personally.
Here’s a good way to stop letting people get under your skin: Remind yourself that their issues are about them, not you. People who don’t like you might be dealing with their own insecurities or frustrations that have nothing to do with you. Taking it personally only gives them power over your emotions. Once you realise that their opinion is theirs to own, you can let it go. The more you let go of their negativity, the easier it is to stay calm and unaffected.
7. Show that you’re unbothered.
One of the best ways to deal with negativity is to show that it doesn’t bother you. When someone’s trying to get under your skin, and they see you’re not phased, it’s likely they’ll stop. If they try to provoke you or make you feel bad, just stay composed. That doesn’t mean pretending everything’s fine or pushing down your feelings — it’s just about not letting their attempts to upset you work. Over time, they’ll realise that trying to get a reaction from you is a waste of their time.
8. Be the bigger person, as hard as that might be.
As tough as it is, sometimes the best move is to rise above the situation. When you take the high road and don’t get sucked into petty arguments or insults, you show real strength. You don’t need to get down to their level to prove a point. By staying calm, kind, or simply silent, you show that you value your peace more than winning a pointless argument. The more you do this, the more respect you’ll earn from the people who matter, and the less power the person causing the drama will have over you.
9. Crack a joke or try a bit of banter if things get too tense.
A bit of humour can work wonders when the atmosphere starts to feel awkward or tense. A well-timed, light-hearted remark can defuse the situation without having to get into an argument. By throwing in a quick joke or a bit of banter, you show that you’re not taking the negativity personally. It’s a subtle way of taking control of the situation, and it also reminds everyone that life’s too short to get bogged down in petty drama. It’s about keeping things light and keeping your cool.
10. Keep your support system close.
Dealing with negativity is so much easier when you’ve got a solid support system. Make sure you’ve got people around you who appreciate you for who you are. Whether it’s friends, family, or colleagues, having a crew that lifts you up makes all the difference. When you’ve got people who value you, the opinion of one person who doesn’t like you won’t sting as much. Your support system is your reminder of what really matters and helps you stay focused on what you’re doing, rather than worrying about the negativity.
11. Address the issue head-on, if it comes to that.
Sometimes, the most direct way to clear the air is to have a proper chat about it. If the person is someone you regularly interact with — like a colleague or family member — sitting down and having a calm, honest conversation can make a big difference. It gives them a chance to explain what’s going on, and it gives you a chance to share your perspective. The key here is to stay calm and approach it without pointing fingers or blaming anyone. It’s about finding understanding and hopefully clearing up any misunderstanding before it goes any further.
12. Don’t gossip about them, whatever you do.
Gossiping about someone who doesn’t like you is never the answer. It might feel good in the moment, but it just keeps the negativity alive and drags you down. Instead of talking behind their back, focus on being respectful in your interactions with them — even if it’s tough. Gossiping only lowers your own standards and makes you part of the problem. By choosing not to gossip, you stay above the drama and protect your own peace.
13. Focus on the positives in your life.
When someone doesn’t like you, it’s easy to get caught up in their negativity and start doubting yourself. But you’ve got so much more going for you than one person’s opinion. Whether it’s your achievements, your relationships, or the things you’re passionate about, focusing on the good stuff in your life can really help put things into perspective. By reminding yourself of all the positives, you’ll feel more grounded and less likely to let their negativity affect you. You are not defined by someone else’s view of you.
14. Let time do the work.
Sometimes, the best thing to do is simply wait it out. People’s opinions can change over time, especially when they see that their negativity isn’t bothering you. Whether it’s a misunderstanding that fades away or someone outgrowing their biases, time often has a way of sorting things out. While you focus on your own life, you let the situation resolve on its own, without having to force anything. Patience is key here — things will often calm down with a bit of time, and you’ll feel much lighter for not having pushed the issue.
