Your relationship is between you and your partner, but if you’re close to your family, and they don’t approve, it can cause some serious tension.
They might not come right out and say it, but there may be some signs that they don’t like your partner much or simply don’t think you’re very good together. Here’s how you know that might be the case.
1. They give your partner the cold shoulder at family get-togethers.
Source: Unsplash You might notice a distinct chill in the air when you arrive with your partner. Family members who once greeted you warmly now offer brief, perfunctory hellos. Their sudden coolness can be a sign that they’re struggling to accept your relationship, choosing distance over confrontation.
2. They never seem to mention your partner.
In conversations about future plans or events, your family pointedly avoids mentioning your partner. Whether it’s holiday arrangements or upcoming gatherings/parties, their exclusion speaks volumes. Such a deliberate omission suggests they’re not considering your partner as a permanent fixture in your life.
3. They take a sudden interest in your exes.
Family members start bringing up your past relationships with surprising frequency. They might reminisce about how much they liked your ex or casually inquire about their current status. They’re clearly unhappy with your current choice, so they’re comparing your partner to your past relationships in some not-so-nice ways.
4. They interrogate you under the guise of small talk.
Casual conversations with your family turn into impromptu interviews about your partner’s background, career, or future plans. While showing interest is normal, an excessive focus on the nitty gritty things, especially with a critical undertone, can mean they’re having doubts about your relationship.
5. They have a selective memory when it comes to your partner.
Despite multiple introductions, family members consistently “forget” key details about your partner. They might mix up their name, profession, or important facts you’ve shared. Their selective amnesia points to a subconscious (or conscious) rejection of your partner’s place in your life, and that’s not cool.
6. They engage in not-so-subtle setup attempts.
You seem to constantly end up in situations where family members are eager to introduce you to their friends’ single children or colleagues, despite knowing you’re in a relationship already. Their matchmaking efforts, however well-intentioned, prove they’re holding out hope for a different partner in your life.
7. There’s an overemphasis on your independence.
Family conversations suddenly focus heavily on your personal goals, career aspirations, or solo travels. While supporting your individuality is a good thing, an excessive emphasis on your life separate from your partner can be a way of subtly discouraging the relationship.
8. They redirect the conversation whenever your partner comes up.
Whenever you bring up your partner or relationship, family members swiftly change the subject. They tend to use this avoidance tactic because they’re uncomfortable or unhappy, but don’t want to express their feelings directly. It’s a passive way of showing disapproval without confrontation.
9. They seem to have excessive praise for single family members.
You notice an unusual amount of attention and admiration directed towards single relatives or friends. Your family might frequently highlight their accomplishments or freedom, subtly implying that being unattached is preferable. They clearly want you to reconsider your own current relationship status.
10. They give you ‘friendly’ warnings.
Family members start sharing cautionary tales about relationships gone wrong or the pitfalls of commitment. While these stories might be presented as general advice, the frequency and timing suggest they’re aimed at making you second-guess your own partnership.
11. There’s a sudden interest in your social circle.
Your family begins asking detailed questions about your friends, particularly those who are single. They might suggest group outings or express a desire to meet these friends. It’s clear that they hope that you’ll form connections outside your current relationship.
12. They give passive-aggressive compliments.
Comments like “You’re so patient with your partner” or “It’s admirable how you handle their quirks” start cropping up in conversations. These backhanded compliments subtly critique your partner while seemingly praising you, revealing underlying disapproval of the relationship.
13. They express an increased concern about your well-being.
Family members suddenly become overly attentive to your health, stress levels, or general happiness. While care is natural, an excessive focus might imply they believe your relationship is negatively impacting your well-being. They may be looking for signs of discontent to validate their concerns.
14. There are far too many ‘accidental’ exclusions.
You find your partner left out of family photos, not invited to smaller gatherings, or forgotten in group messages about family events. These ‘oversights’ are often intentional, and they prove that your family doesn’t view your partner as a true member of the family unit.
15. They love to reminisce about your pre-relationship days.
Source: Unsplash Conversations frequently turn to memories of times before your current relationship. Family members might wax nostalgic about how carefree or ambitious you were, implying that your relationship has changed you in ways they see as negative. Thanks a lot, family.
