Sometimes the picture of perfect mental health isn’t always what it seems. Even the most “well-adjusted” people have habits that can sabotage their well-being without them even realizing it. Let’s lift the curtain on a few sneaky behaviours that might look healthy, but could be holding you back.
1. They never ask for help, even when they’re clearly struggling.
Source: Unsplash We all need a hand sometimes, but some people equate asking for help with weakness. They might be fiercely independent to the point of it becoming harmful. They may think they need to have it all together at all times, or they fear being a burden on anyone else. Refusing to ever reach out, even when genuinely overloaded, is a recipe for burnout.
2. They compare themselves to everyone else constantly.
Source: Unsplash A little healthy competition can be motivating, but fixating on everyone else is a sure-fire way to chip away at your self-esteem. Social media makes this trap easy to fall into. Even if it seems harmless, that constant game of comparison plants seeds of dissatisfaction in your own life. You’ll always find someone “better” if you look hard enough.
3. They bottle up their emotions.
Source: Unsplash “Chin up, just keep going,” is terrible advice in the long run. Suppressing emotions is like shaking up a soda bottle – eventually, it’s going to explode in an unhealthy way. Someone who prides themselves on never showing “negative” emotions may seem stoic, but really, they aren’t giving themselves the space to process those feelings in a healthy way.
4. They define themselves entirely by their career or achievements.
Source: Unsplash Being ambitious is great! But if your entire sense of self-worth is wrapped up in external validation from work or accomplishments, you’re setting yourself up for trouble. What happens if you fail, lose your job, or face a setback? Someone who ties their identity too tightly to achievement will crumble under the weight of those disappointments.
5. They’re terrified of making mistakes.
Source: Unsplash The quest for perfection is a joyless pursuit. People who fear failure often have a paralysing fear of taking risks or trying new things. They play it safe, sticking to what they know, even when deep down they yearn for more. While being cautious can be wise, never stretching beyond your comfort zone hinders growth.
6. They feel the need to always be positive, even when that’s not realistic.
Source: Unsplash Toxic positivity, anyone? It’s the idea that we can just shove down difficult emotions and mask them with relentless cheerfulness. While a positive outlook is valuable, denying sadness, disappointment, or anger leads to those emotions festering into something far more destructive.
7. They’re a chronic people-pleaser.
Source: Unsplash Wanting to be liked is human nature, but people-pleasers take it to extremes. They may struggle to say no, bend over backward to avoid conflict, and mould themselves into whatever they think other people want. The problem? You slowly lose yourself trying to please everyone else. This breeds resentment and can lead to unhealthy relationships with those who exploit your need for external approval.
8. They use productivity as a coping mechanism.
Staying busy can feel virtuous on the surface. But for some, it’s actually an avoidance tactic. Throwing themselves into endless work or projects becomes a way to numb negative feelings or keep difficult thoughts at bay. While there’s nothing wrong with hard work, using it as a way to avoid dealing with deeper issues will only get you so far.
