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Getty Images/iStockphotoSadly, manners are in short supply these days.
People are rude, inconsiderate, and don’t care about how their behaviour affects other people. It doesn’t take much effort and definitely doesn’t cost a thing to be a kind, thoughtful person, but alas, those qualities seem to be in short supply. So, how do you know if you’ve got good manners? If you do the things on this list, consider yourself a lovely person.
1. You say “please” and “thank you” without even thinking about it.
These two simple phrases are like the magic keys to social interaction. They show people that you appreciate and have respect for them and their efforts. Saying “please” and “thank you” shows that you’re not walking through the world with a major sense of entitlement or a chip on your shoulder — in fact, you value courtesy and politeness.
2. You hold doors open for people, even strangers.
It’s a small gesture, but it speaks volumes about your consideration for your fellow human beings. It proves that you’re happy to go out of your way (if holding a door even counts as any real effort) to make other people’s day a little easier/more pleasant, even if just for a second. Whether you’re holding the door for a mum trying to get her pram through or for an older person who’s struggling, it never goes unnoticed.
3. You offer to help without anyone having to ask you.
When you see someone struggling with a heavy bag, a flat tyre, or simply a confused look on their face, you don’t think twice before jumping in. You genuinely want to help, not because you expect anything in return, but because it’s the right thing to do. This proves just how kind and empathetic you really are.
4. You tune in and listen when other people are speaking.
You put away your phone, make eye contact, and truly listen when someone is talking to you. You don’t interrupt, offer unsolicited advice, or try to one-up their story. You’re actually interested in what they have to say and show respect for their thoughts and feelings. This isn’t just good manners — it also makes you someone people love having conversations with.
5. You have good table etiquette, too.
You don’t have to be eating at a fancy restaurant to be mindful of your table manners. You chew with your mouth closed, use your napkin properly, and you don’t slurp or make loud noises while eating (not if you can help it, anyway). You respect the shared dining experience and want to make it enjoyable for everyone at the table.
6. You avoid gossip and negative talk.
Gossiping and spreading rumours about people is school yard nonsense. You understand that words can hurt — you’ve probably been on the receiving end of this kind of behaviour before, and you wouldn’t want to subject anyone else to feeling that way. You might even try to redirect negative conversations towards a more positive direction. This proves just how much integrity you truly have.
7. When you mess up, you apologise (and you mean it).
We all mess up sometimes, but owning your mistakes and offering a genuine apology is a sign of good manners. You don’t make excuses or point the finger. Instead, you acknowledge your wrongdoing, express remorse, and take responsibility for your actions. Your respect for other people and their feelings is admirable — if only everyone followed that way of living.
8. You respect personal space and boundaries.
You don’t invade people’s personal space, touch them without permission, or make them feel uncomfortable in any way. You understand that everyone has different comfort levels, and you respect those boundaries. You also respect people’s privacy and avoid asking intrusive questions or prying into their personal business. If people want to share with you, you’re all ears; otherwise, you don’t overstep.
9. You offer to pay for people sometimes, even when it’s not expected.
Whether it’s picking up the tab for coffee or treating a friend to a Nando’s, you occasionally surprise people with your generosity. You don’t do it for recognition or to show off; you just like making people feel appreciated and cared for. This willingness to go the extra mile financially shows your kind heart and generosity of spirit.
10. You respect people’s time.
You’re punctual for appointments, meetings, and social gatherings. You don’t keep people waiting unnecessarily, and you get that they have schedules and commitments too. If you’re running late, you communicate directly (and in good time) and offer a sincere apology. This respect for time shows that you value people and consider their time as valuable as your own.
11. You think about the words you use and the jokes you make.
You choose your words carefully and avoid using language that could be offensive or hurtful to people. You’re mindful of different sensitivities and avoid making jokes that could be interpreted as racist, sexist, or discriminatory in any way. This awareness and respect for other people demonstrates your good manners and consideration for their feelings.
12. You offer to help clean up or pitch in with chores.
Source: Unsplash Whether it’s after a dinner party, a family gathering, or a simple get-together with friends, you’re always willing to lend a helping hand. You don’t wait to be asked; you actually offer to clear the table, do the washing up, or take out the rubbish. This helpfulness shows that you’re considerate and willing to contribute to a shared effort. You’re always happy to pull your weight (and sometimes other people’s too).
13. You send thank-you notes or express gratitude verbally.
When someone does something nice for you, you make sure to let them know how much you appreciate them. Whether it’s a gift, a favour, or even just something nice they said, you take the time to acknowledge their thoughtfulness and let them know how much you appreciate it.
14. You’re polite and respectful to service workers.
You treat waiters, cashiers, delivery drivers, and other service workers with the same respect and courtesy you would show anyone else. You use polite language, make eye contact, and acknowledge the fact that their jobs are HARD (and likely very underpaid). You understand that everyone deserves to be treated with dignity and respect, regardless of what they do for a living.
15. You’re considerate of other people’s feelings and opinions.
You’re not afraid to disagree with someone, but you do so respectfully and without putting them down. You listen to their perspective, acknowledge their feelings, and try to find common ground. You understand that everyone has the right to their own opinions, and you strive to create an atmosphere of mutual respect and understanding, even in disagreement.
