We all carry a version of our childhood selves inside us.
Whether you ignore it or not, your inner child holds memories, emotions, and unmet needs from our earliest years. Sometimes, they feel neglected, unheard, or unloved. Sure, it sounds a bit new age-y, but offering your inner child the comfort and reassurance they missed can make a huge difference to how your adult self feels and operates in the world. Here are some things that inner child needs to hear (and present you can benefit from too) — repeat as necessary!
1. “You’re safe now.”
Your inner child may still feel trapped in old fears or painful memories. Reassure them that those moments have passed and they’re safe now. Reminding yourself of this can ease anxiety and create a sense of calm. Safety is the foundation for healing.
2. “It’s okay to make mistakes.”
Perfection isn’t the goal, and mistakes don’t define your worth. Let your inner child know that messing up is part of being human. Offering yourself forgiveness helps release feelings of shame and self-criticism. Every mistake is a chance to learn and grow.
3. “Your feelings matter.”
As a child, you may have been told to “stop crying” or “get over it.” These messages can lead to suppressing emotions. Reassure your inner child that their feelings are valid and worthy of attention. Listening to your emotions creates self-acceptance and understanding.
4. “You are loved just as you are.”
Your worth isn’t tied to achievement, behaviour, or meeting anyone else’s expectations. Tell your inner child that they are loved simply for existing. That unconditional love helps heal wounds caused by conditional acceptance in the past. You are enough, exactly as you are.
5. “It’s okay to say no.”
Boundaries are essential, even if you weren’t allowed to have them growing up. Let your inner child know they have the right to protect their space, energy, and feelings. Saying no doesn’t make you selfish; it means you value yourself. Boundaries lead to healthier relationships.
6. “You don’t have to be perfect to be worthy.”
The pressure to be perfect can feel overwhelming. Remind your inner child that they are worthy of love and kindness, flaws and all. Letting go of perfectionism opens the door to self-compassion. You are valuable, even when you stumble.
7. “It’s okay to rest.”
If you grew up feeling you always had to be productive, rest might trigger guilt. Tell your inner child that taking breaks is necessary and deserved. Rest isn’t laziness; it’s a way to care for yourself. You are allowed to pause and recharge.
8. “You are not responsible for other people’s happiness.”
If you felt pressure to keep everyone around you happy, it’s time to release that weight. Your inner child needs to know that it’s not their job to manage other people’s emotions. You can care about people without carrying their burdens. Your needs matter, too.
9. “You are not alone.”
Loneliness as a child can leave a lasting mark. Reassure your inner child that they are not alone anymore. You have the power to be there for yourself, and other people care about you, too. Connection is always possible, even when it feels far away.
10. “You deserve kindness and respect.”
If you were treated poorly or dismissed as a child, you might struggle with self-worth. Let your inner child know that they deserve to be treated with kindness and respect. Accepting this truth helps you set healthy standards for how other people treat you.
11. “Your dreams and desires are important.”
Maybe your childhood wishes were ignored or mocked. Tell your inner child that their dreams matter. Encouraging yourself to pursue what you love gives your inner child permission to hope again. Your passions are valid and worth exploring.
12. “You are allowed to play and have fun.”
Life isn’t just about responsibilities and obligations. Remind your inner child that playfulness and joy are essential. Doing things just for fun reconnects you with a sense of freedom. It’s okay to let loose and enjoy the moment.
13. “You didn’t deserve the hurt you experienced.”
If you went through pain or neglect, your inner child might blame themselves. Reassure them that none of it was their fault. You deserved care, protection, and love. Acknowledging this helps release old guilt and shame.
14. “You are strong and resilient.”
Your inner child may feel fragile or powerless. Remind them of the strength it took to survive and grow. Recognising your resilience helps you feel capable of facing today’s challenges. You’ve overcome more than you realise.
15. “I will take care of you.”
Your inner child needs to know that you’re there to protect and nurture them. Promising to care for yourself creates a sense of security. By showing up for your inner child, you build self-trust and confidence. You are your own safe space.
