No matter how strong a relationship is, nobody’s perfect.
Even the happiest couples have little habits that can cause tension or frustration — that’s just human nature. The good news is that most of these things aren’t deal-breakers, just small patterns that are easily corrected if you nip them in the bud. Of course, ignoring them or letting them go on too long can eat away at your connection, but you care too much about your relationship to let that happen, right? If you notice these things happening, sort yourselves out ASAP.
1. Keeping score
Relationships aren’t a competition, but it’s easy to fall into the habit of mentally tracking who did what. “I cooked dinner, so you should do the washing up.” “I planned the last three date nights, so it’s your turn.” While balance is important, keeping score creates resentment. A relationship works best when both people give freely, rather than constantly measuring what they’re getting in return.
2. Assuming the other person can read your mind
Even couples who know each other inside and out sometimes assume their partner just “gets” what they need without saying anything. But even the most intuitive person isn’t a mind-reader. Expecting your partner to automatically know what’s wrong or what you need can lead to frustration. A little communication goes a long way, and saying what’s on your mind usually works better than hoping they’ll figure it out.
3. Letting small annoyances build up
Every couple has little things that drive each other up the wall, but instead of addressing them early, many people let them pile up until one small thing triggers a massive argument. It’s always better to talk about the little frustrations before they turn into something bigger. A minor irritation today could become an unnecessary meltdown next week if left to fester.
4. Using phones as a distraction instead of engaging
It’s easy to get caught up scrolling through social media, watching TV, or responding to messages instead of actually being present with your partner. Even the closest couples fall into this trap. While there’s nothing wrong with relaxing separately, constantly being glued to your phone when you’re together can create distance. A little effort to be fully present — whether it’s at dinner, during a conversation, or just hanging out — goes a long way.
5. Expecting your partner to fix your bad mood
It’s normal to lean on your partner for emotional support, but sometimes, people expect their partner to be responsible for fixing their mood entirely. If you’re in a bad place, they can comfort you, but they can’t magically make everything better. Even the strongest relationships have moments where one person is struggling. A supportive partner can help, but it’s also important to manage your own emotions rather than relying on them to “fix” things for you.
6. Taking each other for granted
At the start of a relationship, every kind gesture feels exciting. But after a while, people get comfortable and forget to appreciate the little things, assuming their partner just knows how much they mean to them. Even in long-term relationships, it’s important to say thank you, acknowledge effort, and show appreciation. Feeling taken for granted is one of the biggest relationship killers, and avoiding it is as simple as recognising each other’s efforts.
7. Avoiding awkward but necessary conversations
Even happy couples sometimes dodge tough conversations to avoid rocking the boat. Whether it’s money, boundaries, or something that’s been bothering you, putting off uncomfortable discussions only makes things worse. Honest conversations can feel awkward, but they prevent resentment from building up. If something’s bothering you, it’s always better to talk about it than to let it simmer in silence.
8. Letting routine replace excitement
Most couples start off doing fun, spontaneous things together, but the longer you’re together, the more habits take over. Without even realising it, your relationship can start to feel more like a routine than something exciting. Even the happiest couples need to break out of autopilot now and then. Planning a date night, trying something new, or simply switching up your routine can help keep things feeling fresh.
9. Forgetting to check in emotionally
When life gets busy, it’s easy to assume everything is fine unless there’s an obvious problem. However, relationships need regular emotional check-ins, even when things seem good. A simple “How have you been feeling lately?” or “Is there anything you need from me?” can make a huge difference. It’s not just about solving problems; it’s about making sure you’re still connected on a deeper level.
10. Letting little criticisms slip out too often
Every relationship has its fair share of teasing and playful banter, but if small criticisms become too common, they can start to add up. Comments about the way they do things, their habits, or even their appearance can chip away at confidence. A little sensitivity goes a long way. A relationship should be a safe space, and while constructive feedback is fine, constant nitpicking can wear the other person down over time.
11. Comparing your relationship to other people’s
It’s easier than ever to compare relationships, especially with social media showing off picture-perfect couples. Even happy couples sometimes wonder if they should be doing things differently based on what they see online. But every relationship is unique, and comparing yours to someone else’s highlight reel isn’t fair. What matters most is how you feel in your relationship, not how it looks from the outside.
12. Forgetting to have fun together
Relationships aren’t just about love and support — they should be fun too. But even the happiest couples can forget to prioritise playfulness when life gets busy. Laughing together, being silly, or just enjoying each other’s company in a relaxed way helps keep the connection strong. Relationships don’t have to be serious all the time; sometimes, you just need to have a laugh together.
13. Letting stress from outside the relationship seep in
Work stress, family drama, or personal struggles can easily spill into your relationship. Even happy couples sometimes take out their frustrations on each other without meaning to. It’s normal to vent, but making a conscious effort not to treat your partner as an emotional punching bag can prevent unnecessary tension. Recognising when stress is affecting your relationship can help you handle things in a healthier way.
14. Expecting the relationship to stay the same forever
No relationship stays exactly the same. People grow, priorities change, and life happens. Even happy couples can fall into the trap of expecting things to always feel like they did in the beginning. Instead of resisting change, the key is growing together. Relationships evolve, and adapting to each new phase with patience and understanding is what keeps them strong.
15. Not saying “I love you” in different ways
Just saying the words “I love you” is important, but showing love in different ways matters too. The longer you’re together, the more people sometimes forget that love is best expressed through actions, not just words. Whether it’s through small gestures, thoughtful surprises, or just being there when it counts, showing love in different ways keeps the relationship feeling strong and meaningful.
16. Assuming a happy relationship doesn’t take effort
Even the best relationships need care and attention. Some couples assume that as long as they’re happy, they don’t need to put in extra effort, but that’s how things start to drift. Making time for each other, communicating well, and keeping the connection alive are all things that require intention. A great relationship doesn’t just happen — it’s built, little by little, every single day.
