Not everyone comes out and admits when things aren’t going well in life, especially their dating life.
They might insist they’re doing just fine being on their own, but in reality, being single sucks, and they really wish they had a partner. So, how do you know when this is how someone really feels (or maybe if that’s how you’re feeling)? These phrases tend to be pretty common, for starters.
1. “I’m just focusing on myself right now.”
This one sounds great on the surface, but it often hides a deeper desire for connection. Sure, focusing on self-improvement is important, but sometimes people use this as a cover for feeling lonely or frustrated with dating. It’s perfectly okay to want a relationship while also working on yourself.
2. “I don’t need anyone to complete me.”
True, you don’t need a partner to feel whole, but this phrase can sometimes be more about self-protection than self-confidence. Wanting someone to share your life with doesn’t mean you’re incomplete—it just means you’d prefer some companionship.
3. “All the good ones are taken.”
This is classic frustration talking. After a few bad dates or watching friends settle down, it’s easy to feel like the dating pool is empty. But the truth is, there are still plenty of great people out there—it just takes time and patience to meet them.
4. “I’m too busy for a relationship right now.”
Everyone’s busy, but if you really want a relationship, you’ll find the time. This phrase is often a way to avoid putting yourself out there, whether due to fear or past disappointments. When you’re ready for love, your schedule will make room for it.
5. “I’m happy being single. Really.”
The more someone insists on this, the less true it often is. While there are definitely perks to being single, it’s totally fine to admit that you’d rather be with someone. Denying that desire doesn’t make it go away.
6. “I’m just waiting for the right person to come along.”
This passive approach might be a sign that they’re avoiding putting in effort. Yes, it’s great to have standards, but finding a partner usually requires some action on your part. Waiting around might leave you missing opportunities.
7. “Relationships are too much drama anyway.”
This usually comes from watching too many messy relationships or having been hurt before. While relationships do have their challenges, dismissing them entirely can be a way to protect yourself from getting hurt again.
8. “I’m not good at relationships.”
This is often self-doubt talking. No one’s born a relationship expert, and saying this can be a way to avoid trying. Relationship skills can be learned and improved—it just takes effort and a willingness to grow.
9. “I don’t want to settle.”
While it’s smart to have standards, sometimes this is an excuse to avoid relationships altogether. It’s worth considering whether your standards are realistic, or if fear is holding you back from giving someone a real chance.
10. “I’m fine on my own. I’ve got my friends/cat/plants.”
Sure, friends and hobbies are important, but they’re not a substitute for romantic companionship. If you’re constantly turning to these things instead of opening up to the idea of dating, it might be a way of avoiding vulnerability.
11. “Dating apps are the worst. I’m done with them.”
Dating apps can definitely be exhausting, but swearing them off completely might be more about frustration than a real decision. Taking a break from them is one thing, but cutting yourself off from all dating avenues could limit your options.
12. “I’m just not ready for a relationship right now.”
It’s important to feel ready for a relationship, but sometimes this is just a way to avoid putting yourself out there. Ask yourself if it’s really about timing, or if it’s more about being scared of getting hurt again.
13. “Everyone around me is getting married. It’s so annoying.”
The frustration here usually covers up feelings of loneliness or fear of being left behind. It’s okay to feel a mix of happiness for your friends and sadness for yourself—it doesn’t mean there’s anything wrong with where you are in life.
14. “I’m too set in my ways for a relationship.”
Independence is great, but using it as an excuse to avoid relationships could be a defence mechanism. Healthy relationships allow for personal freedom—you don’t have to lose yourself to be with someone.
15. “I’m just enjoying my freedom.”
Source: Unsplash There’s nothing wrong with enjoying your independence, but if you find yourself saying this over and over, it’s worth asking if you’re truly content or if you’re just trying to convince yourself you are.
16. “Maybe I’m just meant to be single.”
Source: Unsplash This defeatist attitude often comes from feeling discouraged by the dating process. Remember, being in a relationship isn’t about fate—it’s about making the choice to open yourself up to love and putting in the effort to find the right person.
