Anxiety has a way of revealing itself in conversations, often showing up in the little things people say without even realising it.
Whether it’s over-explaining, apologising too much, or second-guessing everything, certain phrases tend to come up again and again. If you have anxiety, you might recognise yourself in some of these. If you know someone who struggles with it, chances are you’ll have heard these things, and they might give you insight into what’s going on in the other person’s mind.
1. “Sorry, I know I’m being annoying.”
People with anxiety often feel like they’re bothering everyone, even when they’re not. They might apologise for sending a message, asking a question, or needing reassurance, even when it’s completely reasonable. The fear of taking up too much space or being an inconvenience is something that lingers in their mind. Even when reassured, that doubt doesn’t completely disappear. They may still feel the need to justify why they’re speaking, texting, or asking for support. It’s not that they actually believe they’re annoying; it’s just that anxiety convinces them they are.
2. “I swear I didn’t mean it like that.”
Overthinking conversations is something people with anxiety do constantly. A harmless comment can turn into hours of worry, making them convinced they’ve offended someone without realising it. Even if the other person didn’t react badly, they still feel the need to clarify. They might replay conversations in their head and second-guess how they came across. That lingering worry often leads them to over-explain, just to make sure there’s no misunderstanding. To them, it feels better to over-clarify than to risk being misinterpreted.
3. “Are you mad at me?”
Even when there’s no reason to believe someone is upset, anxiety convinces them otherwise. A delayed text, a neutral tone, or even a change in body language can feel like confirmation that something is wrong. Instead of assuming everything is fine, their mind jumps straight to worst-case scenarios. They don’t ask this to be dramatic — they genuinely feel uneasy. Reassurance might help for a moment, but the doubt often returns. It’s exhausting to always feel like something might be wrong, even when there’s no actual problem.
4. “I just have a weird feeling about this.”
Anxiety doesn’t always need logic to convince someone that something isn’t right. Even if there’s no actual reason to worry, they might still feel on edge about a situation, decision, or person. It’s not always about paranoia—it’s just how their brain processes uncertainty. They may struggle to trust their own instincts because they don’t know if their worry is valid or just their anxiety talking. If someone dismisses this feeling, it can make them even more anxious. Instead of feeling reassured, they might feel unheard or irrational.
5. “I promise I’m fine.”
Most of the time, when someone with anxiety says this, they aren’t actually fine. They don’t want to make a big deal out of their emotions, so they downplay them instead. Asking for help can feel overwhelming, so they choose to hide how they really feel. They may convince themselves that if they say it enough, it will eventually be true. In reality, this often makes things worse because their emotions remain bottled up. Even when they want support, the fear of being a burden stops them from asking for it.
6. “What if I mess this up?”
For people with anxiety, even simple tasks can feel like huge responsibilities. Whether it’s sending a message, making a phone call, or speaking up in a meeting, they constantly fear making a mistake. Instead of assuming things will go smoothly, their mind focuses on what could go wrong. That pressure to be perfect makes even everyday situations overwhelming. They don’t just want to do well—they feel like they have to. The fear of failure is so strong that it can sometimes stop them from even trying at all.
7. “Can you just let me know when you get there?”
Anxiety doesn’t just affect how they feel about themselves; it also extends to the people they care about. If a loved one is travelling, out late, or even just driving home, their brain jumps to worst-case scenarios. Until they get confirmation that everything is fine, their mind won’t stop racing. It’s not about a lack of trust — it’s about the need for certainty. Even if they know, logically, that everything is okay, the worry doesn’t fully go away. That one text or call helps them breathe easier, even if just for a moment.
8. “I overthink literally everything.”
Many people with anxiety are fully aware of how much they overthink. They know they stress over things that don’t actually matter, and they often joke about it to make it feel less overwhelming. Even with that self-awareness, it doesn’t stop their mind from replaying conversations and decisions on a loop. They overanalyse every detail, from how they worded a text to whether they accidentally upset someone days ago. It’s exhausting, but they don’t know how to turn it off. Even when they know they’re overthinking, the urge to do it doesn’t go away.
9. “I feel like everyone secretly hates me.”
Even in strong friendships, anxiety can plant the seed of doubt. It convinces them that people are only being polite, that they’re tolerated rather than genuinely liked. No matter how much reassurance they receive, the fear of being secretly disliked lingers. They might logically know they are loved, but anxiety doesn’t operate on logic. It makes them question their worth and their relationships, even when there’s no reason to. The doubt is always there, waiting for a quiet moment to creep back in.
10. “Can we make a plan and stick to it?”
Uncertainty is one of the biggest triggers for anxiety. Vague plans, last-minute changes, or spontaneous decisions can make them feel overwhelmed. Knowing exactly what to expect helps them feel more in control and reduces the stress of preparing for the unknown. They’re not trying to be rigid or difficult — they just feel more at ease when things are clear. When plans are unpredictable, their mind works overtime imagining every possible outcome. Sticking to a plan gives them a sense of stability in a world that often feels chaotic.
11. “I need a minute.”
Sometimes, anxiety gets too loud, and they need to step away to reset. Whether it’s after a stressful conversation, a social situation, or a sudden wave of panic, taking a break can help them regain control. It’s less about avoiding people than about managing their emotions. Having a moment to breathe can make all the difference in preventing an anxiety spiral. When things feel overwhelming, a short pause can help them process everything. It’s their way of ensuring they don’t get completely consumed by their emotions.
12. “I don’t know why, I just feel off today.”
Anxiety doesn’t always come with a clear reason. Some days, it just shows up out of nowhere, making everything feel heavier than usual. It’s frustrating to not have an explanation, but that’s how anxiety works — it doesn’t always need one. They’re not looking for someone to fix it; they just want to be understood. Sometimes, simply acknowledging the feeling is enough to help them get through it. The best thing someone can do is offer support without pushing for answers.
13. “I feel like I’m annoying you.”
Even in close relationships, anxiety makes people doubt their place in someone’s life. They might feel like they’re texting too much, talking too much, or simply taking up too much of someone’s time. No matter how much reassurance they get, the fear of being a burden lingers in the back of their mind. It’s not that they don’t trust their friends or loved ones; it’s that they struggle to trust their own worth. They worry that people are just being polite rather than genuinely enjoying their company. Even when someone actively shows they care, anxiety whispers, “But what if they don’t?”
14. “I know I’m overreacting, but I can’t help it.”
People with anxiety are often fully aware when their fears aren’t logical, but that doesn’t make them go away. They might know they’re overthinking a situation, but simply telling themselves to stop doesn’t work. Anxiety doesn’t respond to reason — it keeps running in the background, no matter how much they try to calm down. Hearing “you’re overreacting” from someone else usually makes it worse. They don’t need to be reminded that their thoughts aren’t rational—they already know. What helps more is support and understanding, rather than being told to just “let it go.”
15. “I need to go over this one more time.”
Before an important conversation, event, or even a casual interaction, they might rehearse what they’re going to say. Running through every possibility in their mind helps them feel prepared, even if it often makes them more anxious. The fear of saying the wrong thing is so strong that they feel the need to practise in advance. Even after going over it multiple times, they may still second-guess themselves. They don’t want to sound awkward or mess up, so they try to predict every possible outcome. But no matter how much they prepare, their brain will still find something to stress about.
16. “I just need you to tell me everything is okay.”
Sometimes, the only thing that helps is hearing reassurance out loud. Even if nothing is actually wrong, anxiety makes people crave that extra confirmation that everything is fine. They’re not trying to be needy; they’re quieting the endless cycle of worry in their mind. One simple statement like “You’re okay” or “We’re good” can make a huge difference. It helps them hit reset and feel a little more at ease, even if just for a moment. For someone with anxiety, those small reassurances aren’t just comforting — they’re necessary.
