Judgemental people rarely ever just come out and say that they dislike or disapprove of something.
Instead, they drop subtle (or not-so-subtle) words that make it clear they’re looking down on something you’re doing, wearing, or believing in. They have a way of twisting conversations to make you feel like you’ve made the wrong choice, even when you were perfectly happy with it before they opened their mouths. If you’ve ever walked away from a chat feeling slightly judged but not quite sure how, chances are they used one of these words to make their disapproval known.
1. “Interesting…”
This is the go-to word for people who want to judge you without outright saying it. When someone says “interesting” with a slight pause or a raised eyebrow, they’re not genuinely intrigued — they’re processing just how much they disapprove. It’s their way of pretending to be neutral while making it very clear that they think you’ve made a questionable decision. You’ll hear this when you tell them about a career change, an unconventional life choice, or even something as simple as what you had for lunch. “Oh, so you’re doing that now? Interesting.” Translation? They think you’ve lost your mind.
2. “Brave”
Not all compliments are actually compliments. When someone calls you “brave” for something completely normal, like wearing a bright outfit, going on a solo holiday, or speaking your mind in a meeting, it’s not admiration, it’s judgement wrapped in fake praise. They’re not saying, “Wow, you’re inspiring.” They’re saying, “I would never do that, and I can’t believe you are.” The undertone is pure disbelief, not encouragement. However, that doesn’t mean you need to change — if they want to be boring, that’s up to them.
3. “Different”
This is the polite way of saying, “I don’t get it, and I don’t like it.” If you ever show off a new haircut, outfit, or creative idea and the response is, “Oh, that’s… different,” you already know they hate it. It’s the verbal equivalent of an awkward smile. They won’t say it’s bad outright, but they want you to know that, in their opinion, it’s not quite right. But hey, maybe you’re proud of being different (and if you’re not, you should be!).
4. “Fine”
If someone asks for their opinion on something, and they respond with “It’s fine,” they definitely don’t think it’s fine. They think it’s terrible, but they’re acting as if they’re being “nice” by not saying it outright. Judgemental people use “fine” when they don’t approve but don’t want to get into a debate. It’s their way of letting you know they disapprove without giving you a chance to argue back. Good thing you don’t care about their opinion, right?
5. “I mean, if that’s what you want…”
There’s something so deeply condescending about this phrase. It makes it sound like they’re leaving the choice up to you, while strongly implying you’re making the wrong one. They might as well say, “I don’t understand why you’d do this, but sure, go ahead and ruin your own life.” It’s pure passive-aggression dressed up as indifference. It’s clearly what you want, or else you wouldn’t be doing it, for goodness’ sake.
6. “To each their own.”
This is one of those phrases that sounds open-minded but is actually just another way of saying, “I think this is awful, but I’m too polite to say it outright.” It’s usually delivered with a tight-lipped smile, a small shrug, or an exaggerated head tilt. The subtext? “I would never make that choice, but you do you.” It’s a shame they’re not genuine about this — the world could do with being a bit more “live and let live,” don’t you think?
7. “I just think it’s interesting how…”
When a judgemental person starts a sentence with, “I just think it’s interesting how…” buckle up because what follows is never a genuine observation. It’s a lead-in to something shady. “I just think it’s interesting how you always have money for holidays but complain about rent.” “I just think it’s interesting how you’re still single when you’re so picky.” It’s a passive-aggressive way of pointing out something they disapprove of, disguised as innocent curiosity. What business is it of theirs? Chances are, none.
8. “Sure.”
A short word, but so powerful when used with the right tone. “Sure” is what people say when they don’t believe you but don’t want to argue. “I actually love the new job.” “Sure.” “I don’t care what people think.” “Sure.” “It’s not that expensive, really.” “Sure.” It’s the one-word shutdown of disapproval. In fact, it’s so popular that the “Sure, Jan” meme from “The Brady Bunch” is still going strong online.
9. “Are you sure?”
On the surface, this sounds like a simple question, but when said with just the right amount of judgement, it’s actually a direct challenge.” Are you sure you want to do that?” “Are you sure that’s the right decision?” It plants doubt in your mind while making it clear they don’t approve of whatever you’re about to do. Hopefully, you back yourself enough to ignore them altogether and keep moving forward.
10. “Well, that’s one way to do it.”
This is the ultimate backhanded comment because it technically acknowledges that what you’re doing is an option, just not a good one in their eyes. It’s like saying, “Yes, you could do it that way, but why on earth would you?” You’ll hear this when you take an unconventional approach to something and the other person wants you to know they wouldn’t make the same choice.
11. “I wouldn’t, but okay.”
It’s the unnecessary “but okay” that really makes this one sting. Instead of just saying, “I wouldn’t do that,” they have to add the little “but okay” at the end, letting you know they disapprove, but they’re going to let you ruin your own life in peace. They think they’re being subtle, but trust me, everyone sees the shade.
12. “It’s not for me.”
A classic phrase used when someone wants to politely reject something but still make it clear that they would do it. If they really didn’t care, they’d just say nothing. “A gap year in your 30s? Hm. Yeah, it’s not for me.” “Getting tattoos? Mmm, not for me.” It’s not just a statement — it’s a coded message saying, “I don’t approve, but I’ll pretend I’m being chill about it.” Who asked them, anyway?
13. “If you’re happy, that’s all that matters.”
When someone really means this, it’s a nice thing to say. But when a judgemental person says it with a fake smile and slightly raised eyebrows? You already know they think you’ve made a terrible decision. They’re basically saying, “I don’t agree with this at all, but I guess I’ll let you be happy in your own questionable way.”
14. “Well, I guess that’s modern thinking.”
This phrase is usually reserved for people who secretly (or not so secretly) long for the “good old days” and don’t approve of anything new or different. If they say this after you share an opinion, decision, or lifestyle choice, they’re not complimenting your modern thinking — they’re rolling their eyes at it. I feel like we should all be thinking in a “modern” way, don’t you?
15. “That’s… a choice.”
No explanation needed, just pure, unfiltered disapproval. The pause before the word “choice” says everything. Often times, you hear this when you haven’t even asked for an opinion — they’ve so kindly offered it up unsolicited, which makes it all the more obnoxious.
16. “I just worry about you.”
This one might sound caring, but it’s often just judgement disguised as concern. They don’t actually think you’re in danger—they just disapprove and want to guilt you into second-guessing yourself. If someone constantly “worries” about your harmless decisions, it’s usually not about you; it’s about them struggling to accept your choices. At the end of the day, if someone really supports you, they won’t need to lace their words with judgement. And if they do? Well, that’s… a choice.
