Respect is one of the cornerstones of a healthy relationship of any kind, but it’s absolutely vital in a marriage.
Without basic courtesy and consideration for you and your needs, there’s no way your partnership can ever be anything but toxic. And while you might assume that signs of disrespect would be obvious, sometimes they’re much more subtle and hard to spot — though they still do just as much damage. Here’s how you know your husband doesn’t respect you, and if things don’t change, you might not want to be his wife for much longer.
1. He dismisses your opinions.
If he often brushes off or talks over your thoughts, it might be a sign he’s not fully valuing what you bring to the table. Feeling heard and valued in a relationship makes both partners feel closer. When he genuinely listens, it shows he cares about what’s on your mind.
2. He makes you the punchline.
Jokes are fun, but if he’s always making you the punchline, it can start to feel hurtful. Humour is great, but respect means knowing when to draw the line. Feeling like you’re on the same team means he’ll support you, not make fun of you.
3. He ignores your boundaries.
Whether it’s small things like your alone time or bigger personal boundaries, it’s important he respects them. When he oversteps, it shows a lack of consideration for what you need. Respecting boundaries is a way to make sure both partners feel safe and respected.
4. He belittles your achievements.
If he brushes off your accomplishments or makes them feel small, it’s a red flag. Celebrating each other’s wins, big or small, is part of a supportive relationship. Feeling proud of each other creates a bond that’s hard to break.
5. He criticises your appearance.
If he’s constantly making negative comments about how you look, it might be more than just casual remarks. Partners should lift each other up, not make each other feel insecure. Feeling appreciated for who you are is an essential part of respect.
6. He doesn’t care about your needs or make them a priority.
If he’s always putting himself first, it can feel like you’re just an afterthought. Relationships need a balance where both partners feel like their needs are seen. Feeling valued means he’s willing to go out of his way sometimes to make sure you’re happy.
7. He keeps secrets from you.
Honesty and trust go hand in hand, and hiding things can create distance. Transparency helps build trust and makes it easier to rely on each other. When he’s open with you, it shows he respects the relationship enough to keep you in the loop.
8. He never apologises.
If he rarely owns up to his mistakes, it’s a sign he might not be valuing your feelings. Apologising shows he’s willing to take responsibility and keep things fair. Respecting each other’s feelings means making an effort to set things right when things go wrong.
9. He dismisses your feelings.
If he tells you you’re overreacting or being too sensitive, he’s minimising what you’re experiencing. Partners don’t have to understand everything to show empathy. A little understanding goes a long way in showing you’re respected and cared for.
10. He ignores you during conflicts.
If he walks away or shuts down whenever there’s an argument, it might mean he’s not invested in working things out. Respect includes wanting to solve problems together, even when it’s hard. Staying present in tough conversations shows he’s committed to making things work.
11. He compares you to other people (and not in a nice way).
Constantly being compared to other people (particularly other women), even casually, can be hurtful. Feeling valued for who you are means he appreciates your unique qualities. Partners should support each other without making anyone feel like they’re competing with someone else.
12. He doesn’t help around the house.
If he leaves household chores entirely to you, it might show a lack of respect for your time and effort. Sharing responsibilities makes both partners feel like they’re contributing equally. Even small acts of teamwork show he values everything you do.
13. He puts his friends before you.
If he always chooses time with friends over quality time with you, it can feel like you’re not a priority. Respect means balancing time with other people and each other in a way that feels fair. It’s about finding time for everyone without leaving anyone feeling left out.
14. He makes major decisions without consulting you.
Big decisions that affect both of you should feel like a team effort. When he goes ahead without asking for your input, it shows a lack of consideration. Sharing in decisions builds trust and makes both partners feel equally valued.
15. He shows little interest in your life.
If he doesn’t ask about your day or what’s important to you, it can feel like he’s not invested. Genuine interest in each other’s lives is one of the building blocks of a solid relationship. Taking a few moments to check in creates connection and shows he cares.
16. He flirts with other people openly.
Openly flirting with other people in front of you can feel disrespectful and hurtful. Respecting boundaries and understanding what’s comfortable for both partners is key to a healthy relationship. Small gestures of loyalty show he values your relationship and takes it seriously.
17. He doesn’t support your goals.
If he brushes off your dreams or doesn’t take your ambitions seriously, it can feel dismissive. A supportive partner is someone who wants to see you grow and succeed. Respect means cheering each other on, no matter the goal.
