We’ve all fired off a text without thinking, only to cringe moments later when we realise how it might be interpreted.
Text messages lack the nuances of face-to-face conversation – tone of voice, facial expressions, body language – which can lead to misunderstandings and hurt feelings. Because of this, there are certain messages you should just never send because if you do, you’re basically asking for drama.
1. “We need to talk.”
Ah, the dreaded “we need to talk” text. It’s the digital equivalent of a dark cloud looming over your recipient’s head. This phrase instantly triggers anxiety and sets a serious, often negative tone. If you genuinely need to have a serious conversation, opt for a phone call or in-person chat where you can express your concerns with more clarity and empathy.
2. “K.”
The single letter “K” is a passive-aggressive powerhouse. It’s short, curt, and conveys annoyance, disinterest, or dismissal. Even if you’re genuinely busy, try to elaborate with a “Sounds good!” or “Got it, thanks!”. A little extra effort goes a long way in maintaining positive communication.
3. Breaking up with someone.
Ending a relationship via text is just plain cold. It lacks empathy and respect for the other person’s feelings. If you’ve reached the point where a breakup is necessary, have the decency to do it in person or, at the very least, over a phone call where you can offer a more compassionate explanation.
4. Sharing sensitive or confidential information.
Source: Unsplash Text messages aren’t the most secure mode of communication. Avoid sharing sensitive information like passwords, financial details, or private conversations. Screenshots can be easily taken, and messages can be forwarded without your knowledge. If it’s something important and confidential, opt for a more secure channel.
5. Sending unsolicited explicit content.
Source: Unsplash This should go without saying, but never send unsolicited explicit messages or images. It’s disrespectful, invasive, and could have serious legal consequences. Always obtain explicit consent before sharing anything of this nature.
6. Making accusations or starting arguments.
Source: Unsplash Text messages aren’t the ideal platform for heated discussions or accusations. It’s easy for misunderstandings to arise, and the lack of non-verbal cues can exacerbate the situation. If you have a conflict, try to resolve it calmly and respectfully in person or over a phone call.
7. Responding with excessive emojis.
Source: Unsplash While emojis can add a touch of fun to your messages, overusing them can be overwhelming and make you appear immature. Use them sparingly to convey emotions and enhance your message, but don’t let them become a substitute for actual words.
8. Sending long, rambling messages.
Source: Unsplash Nobody enjoys reading a novel-length text message. If you have a lot to say, consider breaking it down into smaller, more digestible chunks, or better yet, give the person a call. Long texts can be difficult to follow and may lose the recipient’s interest halfway through.
9. Giving important news without a heads-up.
Source: Unsplash Imagine receiving a text that says, “I’m pregnant!” or “I quit my job!” without any prior warning. Major announcements deserve more personal delivery than a casual text. Give your loved ones a heads-up with a phone call or meet them in person to share important news and gauge their reactions.
10. Oversharing personal drama.
Source: Unsplash Venting about your frustrations or relationship troubles can be therapeutic, but texting isn’t always the best outlet. Oversharing personal drama can overwhelm your friends and make them feel uncomfortable. Choose your confidants wisely and consider talking to a therapist or counsellor for professional support.
11. Sending cryptic or passive-aggressive messages.
Source: Unsplash “If you know, you know,” or “I guess some people are just too busy,” are examples of cryptic messages that leave the recipient confused and frustrated. Avoid passive-aggressive remarks and communicate your thoughts and feelings clearly to avoid misunderstandings.
12. Drunk texting.
Source: Unsplash We’ve all been tempted to send a text or two after a few drinks, but resist the urge. Drunk texts are often embarrassing, incoherent, and can lead to regrettable decisions. Put your phone away and enjoy your night out responsibly.
13. Ghosting someone after a date.
Source: Unsplash If you’re not interested in seeing someone again after a date, it’s courteous to let them know instead of disappearing without a trace. A simple text explaining that you didn’t feel a connection is better than leaving them hanging.
14. Sending multiple messages in a row.
Source: Unsplash Bombarding someone with multiple messages when they haven’t responded can be overwhelming and come across as needy. Give them time to reply, and avoid double-texting unless it’s urgent, or you’re following up on a previous message.
15. Using all caps.
Source: Unsplash Typing in all caps is the digital equivalent of shouting. It’s aggressive, jarring, and can be interpreted as anger or frustration. Use all caps sparingly, if at all, and opt for a more measured tone in your text messages.
16. Replying with just “lol.”
Source: Unsplash While “lol” can be a quick way to acknowledge something funny, it can also feel dismissive or insincere. If you genuinely found something amusing, try to elaborate with a “That’s hilarious!” or “I needed that laugh.”
17. Texting while driving.
This is not only a bad texting habit, but it’s also incredibly dangerous. Distracted driving is a leading cause of accidents. Put your phone away, focus on the road, and arrive safely at your destination.
