19 Things Decent People Do (That Secretly Annoy Everyone Else)

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We all know those people who are genuinely kind and well-intentioned — the ones we’d call “decent folks.”

But even the best of us can have habits that, while seemingly harmless, might rub people the wrong way. You’re not trying to be malicious — it’s just those little quirks that can subtly grate on people’s nerves. Here are some of those things decent people do that might secretly annoy everyone else.

1. They overshare on social media.

We all love a good life update, but there’s a fine line between sharing and oversharing. Those constant posts about your breakfast, your gym routine, and every minute detail of your day can clutter up people’s feeds and make them want to hit the unfollow button. Remember, a little mystery can be intriguing!

2. They reply to every message instantly.

Being responsive is great, but responding to every text or email within seconds can create an expectation of instant gratification. It might also make people feel like they’re interrupting your day, even if you genuinely enjoy chatting. Sometimes, it’s okay to let a message simmer for a bit before replying.

3. They offer unsolicited advice.

It’s natural to want to help our friends and family, but offering advice when it’s not asked for can feel condescending and intrusive. People often just want to vent or share their thoughts without being told what to do. Unless they explicitly ask for your opinion, it’s best to lend a listening ear and offer support instead of solutions.

4. They humblebrag.

We all have accomplishments we’re proud of, but there’s a way to share them without sounding like you’re bragging. Humblebragging – disguised bragging – can come across as insincere and attention-seeking. Instead, be genuinely enthusiastic about your achievements while acknowledging other people’s effort and support.

5. They’re always late.

Being chronically late is a common pet peeve for many people. It shows a lack of respect for other people’s time and can disrupt plans and schedules. Even if you’re just running a few minutes behind, make an effort to communicate your delay and apologise for the inconvenience. Punctuality is a simple way to show consideration for other people.

6. They’re overly apologetic.

Saying “sorry” when you’ve made a mistake is important, but apologising excessively for minor things can become grating. It can make you seem unsure of yourself and even diminish the sincerity of your apologies when they’re truly needed. Own your actions and apologise when necessary, but don’t let “sorry” become your default response.

7. They overuse exclamation points!!!!!!!

Enthusiasm is great, but too many exclamation points can make your messages seem overly excited or even insincere. They can also be distracting and make it difficult to gauge the tone of your message. Use exclamation points sparingly to emphasise a point or express excitement, but don’t let them become a crutch.

8. They’re constantly correcting people.

No one likes to be wrong, but constantly correcting people’s grammar, pronunciation, or factual errors can make you seem pedantic and condescending. Unless the error is significant or could lead to misunderstanding, it’s often best to let it slide. Choose your battles and focus on building positive connections rather than nitpicking.

9. They talk over people.

In the excitement of a conversation, it’s easy to accidentally interrupt someone. But consistently talking over people can make you seem rude and disrespectful. Practice active listening, letting people finish their thoughts before sharing your own. It shows that you value their opinions and creates a more inclusive and engaging conversation.

10. They are chronic “one-uppers.”

Sharing experiences and achievements is natural, but constantly trying to outdo people can be exhausting and deflating for those around you. If someone shares a story about their recent trip, resist the urge to immediately launch into a tale of your own more extravagant vacation. Instead, show genuine interest in their experience and celebrate their joy.

11. They give backhanded compliments.

While compliments are usually appreciated, backhanded ones can leave a sour taste. Saying things like, “You look great for your age!” or “That dress is surprisingly flattering on you” can undermine the positive intent. Offer sincere compliments that focus on the person’s qualities or achievements without any hidden digs.

12. They are overly enthusiastic about everything.

Enthusiasm is contagious, but too much of it can be overwhelming for some people. If you’re constantly bubbling over with excitement about every little thing, it can make people feel like they need to match your energy level, even if they’re not feeling it. Dial back the intensity a bit and be mindful of the energy of those around you.

13. They are chronic “yes” people.

Being agreeable is a good quality, but always saying “yes” to everything can lead to burnout and resentment. It’s okay to say “no” sometimes, especially if you’re feeling overwhelmed or overcommitted. Setting boundaries is a healthy way to protect your time and energy and ensure that you’re able to show up fully for the things that truly matter.

14. They are overly sensitive to criticism.

Constructive criticism is an opportunity for growth, but some people take it personally and react defensively. If you bristle at any feedback, even if it’s well-intentioned, it can make it hard for people to communicate honestly with you. Learn to take criticism in stride and use it as a chance to improve yourself.

15. They are constantly on their phone.

In today’s digital age, it’s easy to become glued to our phones. But constantly checking messages, scrolling through social media, or playing games can be incredibly rude, especially when you’re with other people. Put your phone away during conversations and social gatherings. It shows respect for those around you and allows you to be more present in the moment.

16. They’re overly critical of people.

While constructive feedback can be helpful, constantly criticising people can be hurtful and alienating. It’s important to remember that everyone is on their own journey and has their own struggles. Focus on celebrating people’s strengths and offering support rather than pointing out their flaws. A little kindness can go a long way.

17. They are always trying to fix people’s problems.

Helping people is a noble quality, but trying to fix everyone’s problems can be exhausting for both you and the person you’re trying to help. Sometimes, people just need to vent or share their feelings without being offered solutions. Listen empathetically and offer support, but resist the urge to jump in and try to solve everything.

18. They are overly competitive.

A little friendly competition can be fun, but constantly trying to win at everything can make you seem insecure and overly focused on yourself. Remember, life isn’t a race. Celebrate other people’s successes and focus on your own personal growth rather than always trying to be the best.

19. They are always trying to please everyone.

Being considerate of other people’s feelings is important, but trying to please everyone all the time is an impossible task. It can lead to burnout, resentment, and a loss of your own identity. Learn to set boundaries and put your own needs first sometimes. It’s okay to disappoint people sometimes. Focus on being authentic and true to yourself, and the right people will appreciate you for who you are.