There’s nothing worse than a know-it-all who thinks the sun shines out of their own backside.
No matter how little experience they have or how out of their depths they are, that doesn’t stop them from running their mouths and saying things that are ridiculous at best and downright offensive at worst. The next time the know-it-all in your life comes out with something that makes you want to smack them, try to keep your cool and use one of these responses instead. Sometimes you just have to be the bigger person.
1. “Are you open to hearing a different perspective?”
Source: Unsplash This question encourages the other person to consider other viewpoints, hopefully opening the door for a more interesting and rewarding conversation. It also subtly challenges their assumption that their opinion is the only valid one.
2. “That’s an interesting point, but let’s hear what other people think.”
When you want to acknowledge the know-it-all’s contribution while also making it clear that the convo isn’t solely about their POV, this is the way to go. It encourages a more inclusive and collaborative chat, preventing any one person from dominating the conversation (which is how it should be).
3. “I respect your opinion, but I’m not really convinced. Why do you think that?”
This shows respect for the person’s opinion while also expressing your own doubts. This way, they can either provide more evidence or explain their reasoning in more detail, which can lead to a deeper understanding of their perspective (or reveal where they’re going wrong). Don’t be surprised if they clam up if they haven’t got anything to back up their nonsense.
4. “While I appreciate your input, the facts don’t seem to align with what you’re saying.”
This phrase is basically another way of saying “the math ain’t mathin’,” and it politely challenges the person’s claims without directly accusing them of being wrong. It also lets them know that you’re not just going to accept something that’s clearly false, and that they’ll need to provide the so-called receipts if they want to get you on side.
5. “I’m curious about the source of that information. Could you share where you heard it?”
Given how much fake news is out there, you have every right to ask where they’re getting their info, which can help you assess its credibility. It can also expose any biases or misinformation they may be unknowingly perpetuating.
6. “That’s a valid viewpoint, but have you considered other angles?”
This acknowledges the person’s perspective while also encouraging them to think more critically and explore alternative viewpoints (if they’re even capable of that, that is). It can help them see the issue from a broader perspective and potentially expand their understanding.
7. “I appreciate your passion for this topic, but let’s try to keep things objective.”
There’s nothing wrong with feeling enthusiastic about a topic, but that doesn’t erase the need for facts and evidence — their personal opinions and feelings aren’t going to cut it. Saying this can help de-escalate a heated discussion and bring it back to a more productive track.
8. “Thanks for sharing, but I’m going to form my own opinion on this.”
Sometimes you just have to find a way to agree to disagree. You’re not telling them that they’re not allowed to think what they want, but you’re letting them know that you’re not about to fall in line and can make your own mind up.
9. “I’m having trouble following your logic. Could you explain that in a different way?”
This is a great way of asking for clarification without resorting to accusing them of being full of it. It gives the person a chance to rephrase their argument or provide more context, which may help you understand their point of view better.
10. “I’m not interested in getting into a debate right now.”
Source: Unsplash When you’re looking for a direct and assertive way to set boundaries and disengage from an unwanted argument, this is for you. It’s important to use a firm but polite tone to convey your message effectively.
11. “Let’s agree to disagree.”
Source: Unsplash This is a classic for a reason — it ends a discussion when it’s clear that you and the other person have differing POVs. It acknowledges that you’re never going to see things the same way without creating more drama or animosity.
12. “I hear what you’re saying, but I need some time to process this information.”
Source: Unsplash This response buys you time to think critically about what the person has said, rather than feeling pressured to respond immediately. It shows respect for their input while also giving yourself space to form your own conclusions. Why should you be rushed into making a decision?
13. “Maybe we can revisit this when we have more information.”
Source: Unsplash When there are too many balls in the air, sometimes you need to table the discussion until more information or evidence is available. It can be a tactful way to avoid getting drawn into a fruitless debate based on speculation or incomplete knowledge.
14. “I value your input, but I’m going to trust my own judgment on this one.”
Source: Unsplash This politely acknowledges their opinion while affirming your autonomy and confidence in your own decision-making abilities, and there’s nothing wrong with that. It’s a way to politely but firmly stand your ground.
15. “I understand your perspective, but I see things a bit differently.”
Source: Unsplash You can introduce your own opinions and thoughts without invalidating theirs, and this accomplishes that brilliantly. It’s a more diplomatic way to disagree than simply saying, “You’re wrong.” It doesn’t shut the door on the conversation completely, so there’s still room for progress.
16. “I’m happy to discuss this further, but let’s try to keep things respectful and avoid personal attacks.”
This one sets clear boundaries for a respectful discussion. It communicates that you’re open to talking more but that you won’t tolerate any insults or ad hominem attacks. It can help maintain a civil and productive conversation, even when disagreements pop up (and they always do with know-it-alls).
17. “I think we’re both passionate about this topic, but we may need to find a compromise.”
Source: Unsplash This recognises the common ground you share with the other person while also highlighting the need for compromise. It suggests that both of you have valid points and that a mutually agreeable solution is possible, if they’ll allow it.
18. “I’m not comfortable with this line of questioning. Can we change the subject?”
This phrase is a direct and assertive way to set boundaries and disengage from an uncomfortable conversation. It’s important to use a firm tone and avoid engaging in further discussion once you’ve stated your discomfort. They just need to accept and respect it.
19. “That’s a very strong opinion. Can you explain the basis for your beliefs?”
This question challenges the person to articulate the reasoning behind their beliefs, which know-it-alls won’t be too familiar with. It can help expose any biases or assumptions they may be making. It’s a way to engage them in a deeper conversation and potentially challenge their preconceived notions.
20. “I’m going to need some time to think about what you’ve said before I can respond.”
This response gives you time to gather your thoughts and formulate a well-considered response. It prevents you from saying something you might regret in the heat of the moment and allows you to approach the conversation with a calmer, more rational perspective.
21. Silence (and a knowing smile).
Sometimes, the best response is no response at all. A simple smile and a change of subject can be enough to disarm a know-it-all and signal that you’re not interested in engaging with their ego-driven behaviour.
