Overthinking is pretty common, but it can also be debilitating if it gets out of hand.
It’s normal to mill things over in your head, especially if you’re trying to make a major decision or are going through big life changes. However, the downsides of being someone who overanalyses even the smallest thing are intense. How many of these sound like you?
1. You replay conversations in your head endlessly, analysing every word and inflection.
Did I say the right thing? Did they understand what I meant? Did I come across as awkward or rude? These are the questions that plague an overthinker’s mind long after a conversation has ended. Every word, every pause, every facial expression is dissected and analysed, leading to a never-ending cycle of self-doubt and regret.
2. You spend hours crafting the perfect text message, then delete it and start over.
Every word choice, every emoji, every punctuation mark is carefully considered. You want to convey the exact right tone and avoid any potential misunderstandings, but the more you overthink it, the more convoluted and confusing your message becomes. It’s a frustrating cycle that can leave you feeling drained and indecisive.
3. You constantly worry about what other people think of you.
Do they like me? Do they think I’m weird? Did I say something stupid? These are the thoughts that swirl through an overthinker’s mind, often leading to anxiety and self-consciousness. You find yourself overanalysing every single social interaction, trying to decipher hidden meanings in every comment or gesture.
4. You second-guess every decision you make.
From what to wear in the morning to which career path to pursue, overthinkers can struggle with even the simplest decisions. You weigh the pros and cons, consider every possible outcome, and often end up feeling paralysed by indecision. The fear of making the wrong choice can be overwhelming.
5. You have trouble falling asleep because your mind won’t stop racing.
As soon as your head hits the pillow, the thoughts start flooding in. (I can’t tell you how many times this has happened to me.) You replay the day’s events, worry about the future, and dissect every interaction you had. Sleep becomes a pipe dream, as your mind refuses to quiet down and let you rest.
6. You overanalyse your relationships and always look for hidden meanings and motives.
Is my partner really happy? Are my friends secretly annoyed with me? Am I being too needy or clingy? These are the questions that can consume an overthinker’s mind, leading to unnecessary anxiety and insecurity. You might read too much into a text message, misinterpret a comment, or overanalyse a facial expression.
7. You struggle to let go of the past, and constantly relive mistakes and regrets.
The past can be a heavy burden for an overthinker. You might replay embarrassing moments, relive painful experiences, or dwell on things you wish you had done differently. This can prevent you from moving forward and enjoying the present.
8. You worry about things that are unlikely to happen.
Overthinkers often have a tendency to catastrophise, imagining the worst-case scenario in every situation. You might worry about things that are highly unlikely to happen, such as getting fired from your job, being diagnosed with a serious illness, or losing a loved one. This can lead to unnecessary stress and anxiety.
9. You can never make decisions in the moment, and often prefer to “sleep on it.”
Spontaneity can be a challenge for overthinkers. You might prefer to mull things over, weigh your options, and gather more information before making a decision. This can be helpful in some situations, but it can also lead to missed opportunities and unnecessary delays.
10. You can never just relax and enjoy the present moment.
With your mind constantly racing, it can be hard to simply be in the moment and enjoy what’s happening around you. You find yourself worrying about the future, replaying the past, or overthinking your next move, which keeps you from truly experiencing and appreciating the present.
11. You’re easily triggered by constructive criticism and feedback.
Overthinkers often take criticism to heart, analysing every word and looking for hidden meanings. A simple comment can trigger a spiral of self-doubt and insecurity. You might dwell on negative feedback, replaying it over and over in your head and questioning your own worth.
12. You find it hard to trust your own instincts.
With all the overthinking and second-guessing, it can be hard to trust your gut feeling. You might question your own judgement, even when your instincts are telling you to go in a certain direction. This can lead to missed opportunities and a lack of confidence in your own abilities.
13. You feel exhausted by your own thoughts.
The constant mental chatter can be draining and overwhelming. You might feel like you’re constantly running on a hamster wheel, never able to escape your own thoughts. This can lead to fatigue, burnout, and even physical symptoms like headaches and stomachaches.
14. You struggle to let go of perfectionism.
Overthinkers often strive for perfection in everything they do. You might have impossibly high standards for yourself and the people around you, leading to constant disappointment and frustration. Learning to embrace imperfection and accept that mistakes are a part of life can be a liberating experience.
15. You feel misunderstood, and like no one “gets” you.
Your thoughts and feelings are complicated and can be hard to articulate, which often leads you feeling misunderstood and isolated. You feel like no one truly gets you, or that you’re the only one who thinks and feels the way you do. Finding like-minded people and learning to express yourself more effectively can help you feel less alone.