You might want to see the best in people, but sometimes that trust can be misplaced.
It’s easy to get caught up in the flow of relationships and miss the subtle signs that someone might be taking advantage of your kindness. Here are some red flags to watch out for so you don’t end up drained, disrespected, and hurt.
1. They only contact you when they need something.
Source: Unsplash If someone only reaches out when they need a favour, a ride, or a shoulder to cry on, it might be a sign that they’re not genuinely invested in the relationship. True friends and partners are there for you in good times and bad, not just when it’s convenient for them.
2. They never offer to reciprocate.
Healthy relationships involve a give-and-take dynamic. If you’re always the one doing favours, offering support, or making sacrifices without any reciprocation, it might be a sign that the other person is taking you for granted. Pay attention to whether they express gratitude or make any effort to return the favour.
3. They dismiss your feelings or needs.
Someone who consistently dismisses your feelings or needs is not respecting your boundaries or valuing your well-being. They might minimise your concerns, make you feel guilty for expressing yourself, or prioritise their own needs above yours. A healthy relationship involves mutual respect and empathy.
4. They make you feel guilty for saying “no.”
If someone guilt-trips you or makes you feel bad for setting boundaries or saying “no” to their requests, they’re likely trying to manipulate you into doing what they want. You have the right to say “no” without feeling obligated to justify your decision.
5. They take credit for your ideas or accomplishments.
Someone who takes credit for your work or ideas is not only disrespectful but also potentially damaging to your career or reputation. It’s important to stand up for yourself and ensure that your contributions are acknowledged and appreciated.
6. They make you feel like you’re always walking on eggshells.
If you’re constantly worried about upsetting someone or triggering their anger or disapproval, it might be a sign that you’re in a toxic relationship. You should feel safe and comfortable expressing yourself without fear of backlash or emotional manipulation.
7. They drain your energy or leave you feeling emotionally exhausted.
Spending time with someone who constantly complains, gossips, or creates drama can leave you feeling emotionally drained and depleted. Healthy relationships should uplift and energise you, not leave you feeling exhausted and negative.
8. They make you question your own worth or sanity.
Gaslighting is a manipulative tactic that involves making someone doubt their own perceptions or reality. If someone consistently makes you feel like you’re crazy, overreacting, or imagining things, it’s a major red flag. Trust your instincts.
9. They isolate you from your friends and family.
Someone who tries to control your social circle or limit your contact with loved ones is likely trying to exert power and control over you. Healthy relationships encourage you to maintain strong connections with your support network, not isolate you from them.
10. They constantly criticise or belittle you.
Constructive criticism can be helpful for growth, but constant negativity and put-downs are toxic and damaging to your self-esteem. Someone who truly cares about you will uplift and support you, not tear you down.
11. They make you feel responsible for their happiness.
Your happiness is your own responsibility, and no one else should burden you with the expectation of making them happy. If someone consistently relies on you to fix their problems or boost their mood, it’s an unfair and unhealthy dynamic.
12. They’re always asking for money or financial help.
While it’s natural to help out a friend or loved one in need, someone who consistently asks for money without making any effort to improve their own financial situation might be taking advantage of your generosity. It’s important to set boundaries and protect your own financial well-being.
13. They never apologise or admit when they’re wrong.
Everyone makes mistakes, but someone who refuses to acknowledge their wrongdoing or offer a sincere apology is likely lacking in empathy and accountability. A healthy relationship involves mutual respect and a willingness to take responsibility for one’s actions.
14. Your gut tells you something’s not right.
Trust your instincts. If something feels off in a relationship, even if you can’t quite pinpoint why, it’s worth paying attention to those feelings. Your intuition is often a powerful indicator of whether a situation or person is healthy for you. Don’t ignore those red flags, even if they seem subtle or insignificant.
