You probably make grand promises with the best of intentions, but how many do you actually follow through on?
Maybe something legitimately came up, or maybe you didn’t realise the magnitude of what you were committing to. Either way, you might be guilty of overpromising and underdelivering on a regular basis if relate to these things.
1. You’re always apologising for missed commitments.
Source: Unsplash If your conversations are full of “Sorry I couldn’t make it” or “I know I said I’d help with…”, it might be time to take a hard look at your promises. Consistently missing commitments, whether it’s a work deadline or a friend’s birthday party, is a clear sign that you’re overestimating what you can accomplish.
2. Your New Year’s resolutions never make it past the second week in January.
We all start the year with grand plans, but if your resolutions consistently fizzle out before February, you might be overpromising to yourself. Setting unrealistic goals, like going to the gym every day when you currently go once a month, is setting yourself up for failure. Start small and build up — it’s better to exceed modest expectations than to fall short of lofty ones.
3. Your to-do list never seems to get shorter.
You’re always adding new tasks but rarely crossing anything off, which is a sign you’re committing to more than you can handle. This applies to both work projects and personal chores. A never-ending to-do list can be overwhelming and demoralising. It might be time to start saying “no” to new commitments until you’ve caught up with your existing ones.
4. You often cancel plans at the last minute.
Occasionally something comes up and plans change, but if you’re regularly cancelling on friends or family at the eleventh hour, you’re likely overpromising your time. Doing this too often can strain relationships and make people hesitant to include you in plans. Be realistic about your availability when making social commitments.
5. You regularly use the word “hopefully” when making commitments.
“I’ll hopefully make it to your party.” Sound familiar? Using “hopefully” can be a subconscious way of giving yourself an out. It suggests you’re not entirely confident in your ability to follow through. If you use this word a lot, it might be time to reassess your commitments.
6. You’re always “just about to start” on promised tasks.
Whether it’s a work project or redecorating the spare room, if you constantly tell people you’re “just about to start” on something you promised weeks ago, you’re probably guilty of overpromising. Don’t put yourself in such a stressful position!
7. You often feel overwhelmed and stressed about your commitments.
Feeling constantly stressed about all the things you’ve promised to do is a clear sign you’ve taken on too much. This could be anything from work deadlines to social obligations to personal projects. While some stress is normal, constantly feeling overwhelmed can affect your mental health and the quality of your life.
8. You make excuses more often than you’d like.
“I got stuck in traffic” or “My alarm didn’t go off” might work occasionally, but if you’re frequently explaining why you couldn’t deliver on your promises, it’s time to take a step back. This applies to work, social commitments, and personal goals alike. Honesty about your capabilities is always better than a string of excuses.
9. You agree to help without considering your schedule.
Saying “Sure, I can help you move house next weekend” without even glancing at your calendar is a recipe for overcommitment. Before agreeing to any commitment, take a moment to realistically assess your current workload and personal obligations. It’s better to say no upfront than to let someone down later.
10. You always underestimate how long things will take.
If you’re always running late or missing deadlines because things took longer than expected, you might be guilty of underestimating time requirements. This can apply to work projects, DIY home improvements, or even getting ready for a night out. Be more generous with your time estimates so that you don’t disappoint people and stress yourself out.
11. You have a hard time saying no to requests.
A fear of disappointing people or missing out can make it hard to say no, but agreeing to every request that comes your way, whether it’s extra work from your boss or another commitment on your kids’ PTA, is a guaranteed way to overcommit yourself.
12. You often deliver work or favours that aren’t up to your usual standards.
If you submit a lot of rushed work or do half-hearted favours just to tick them off your list, that’s a problem. Quality shouldn’t be sacrificed for the sake of keeping a promise. It’s better to negotiate a more realistic timeline than to deliver subpar results.
13. Your personal goals keep getting pushed back.
If that novel you’ve been meaning to write or that language you’ve been planning to learn keeps getting pushed to “next month” or “next year,” you might be overpromising to yourself. Be realistic about your personal goals and the time you have available to pursue them.
14. You often feel the need to multitask to keep up with commitments.
If you find yourself trying to reply to work emails while at your child’s football match, or thinking about your to-do list during dinner with friends, it’s a sign you’re overcommitted. Multitasking often means you’re not fully present for anything, which can affect both your performance and your relationships.
15. You’re jealous of people who seem to have their life balance sorted.
If you’re constantly in awe of people who manage to balance work, family, hobbies, and self-care, it might be because you’re overcommitting yourself. Remember, a healthy life balance isn’t a luxury — it’s necessary for long-term wellness. Don’t promise away your time and energy in an effort to do it all. It’s okay to prioritise and let some things go.
