If you’re the go-to person who’s always looking after everyone else, you know how rewarding—and exhausting—it can be.
However, while you’re busy putting everyone else first, what about you? If your own needs and desires tend to fall by the wayside more often than not, it’s important to start putting yourself first, at least sometimes. Here are a few ways to prioritise yourself without feeling guilty. Because you deserve it too!
1. Schedule “me-time” and treat it like a non-negotiable appointment.
If you wouldn’t cancel plans with a friend, don’t cancel on yourself. Block out time just for you, whether it’s an hour or an afternoon. Treat this time with the same importance you give to looking after other people. It could be a bubble bath, a walk in the park, or simply lounging with a book. The point is, it’s your time, no excuses.
2. Learn to say “no” without overexplaining.
Saying “yes” to everything is a one-way ticket to burnout. Remember, “no” is a complete sentence. You don’t have to give a detailed explanation. Just a simple, “I can’t commit to that right now” is enough. Every time you say no to something that drains you, you’re saying yes to your own well-being.
3. Treat yourself the way you’d treat a loved one.
Would you tell your best mate to keep pushing through exhaustion? Probably not. So why do it to yourself? Be kind and compassionate with yourself, just as you are with everyone else. If you need a break or a treat, give yourself permission to take it. You’re just as worthy of care and kindness.
4. Set boundaries and stick to them.
Boundaries are like fences for your emotional garden—they keep you from feeling overwhelmed. Decide what you’re comfortable with and communicate it clearly. For example, “I’m happy to help, but I can only do it on weekends.” Sticking to these boundaries helps you protect your energy and mental health.
5. Take breaks before you need them.
Don’t wait until you’re totally drained to take a break. Schedule small pauses throughout your day, even if it’s just five minutes to breathe or stretch. Think of it like recharging your battery. Little breaks add up and stop you from reaching the point of total exhaustion.
6. Do something that’s just for fun, not productivity.
You don’t always have to be ticking things off a list. Find an activity that brings you joy just for the sake of it. Maybe it’s dancing in your kitchen, watching silly videos, or doodling. Give yourself permission to enjoy things that aren’t “useful”—because fun is useful for your soul.
7. Delegate tasks (yes, really!).
You don’t have to do it all yourself. It might feel strange at first, but asking for help doesn’t mean you’re failing. Whether it’s at work, home, or in your social circles, let other people pitch in. Sharing the load means you have more time and energy to look after yourself.
8. Practice mindfulness, even in tiny doses.
Mindfulness doesn’t have to mean long meditation sessions. Try short moments of being present: feel the warmth of your tea, notice the sound of the rain, or take three slow breaths. These little pauses help calm your mind and keep you grounded throughout the day.
9. Plan something to look forward to.
Having something on the horizon that excites you can be a powerful motivator. Plan a day trip, a night out with friends, or even a quiet afternoon alone. Knowing there’s joy ahead can help you push through the tough days and remind you that self-care matters.
10. Check in with yourself regularly.
How are you feeling? No, really—how are you actually feeling? Take a minute to check in with your body and mind. Are you tense? Tired? Happy? Acknowledging your own needs helps you stay in tune with yourself. If you notice you’re off-balance, take steps to adjust before things snowball.
11. Don’t feel guilty about resting.
Rest isn’t a luxury; it’s a necessity. If you feel guilty when you rest, remind yourself that recharging allows you to show up better for other people. You wouldn’t expect your phone to keep working without charging it, so why expect it from yourself?
12. Move your body in a way that feels good.
Exercise doesn’t have to be a gruelling workout. Find a way to move that you genuinely enjoy, whether it’s dancing, yoga, walking, or even stretching in bed. Movement helps release tension, boosts your mood, and reminds you that your body deserves care too.
13. Surround yourself with people who lift you up.
If you’re constantly giving to other people, make sure you have people who give back to you. Spend time with friends or family who make you feel seen, heard, and supported. These relationships help refill your emotional cup so you don’t feel drained all the time.
14. Indulge in small, daily treats.
Self-care doesn’t have to be a grand gesture. Small things like your favourite snack, a new candle, or a 10-minute foot soak can make a big difference. Daily treats remind you that you’re worth a bit of joy and comfort every single day.
15. Remember, you’re allowed to put yourself first.
It’s not selfish to prioritise your own needs. Think of it like being on a plane: you have to put on your own oxygen mask before helping other people. Taking care of yourself means you’ll have more energy and love to share with those who need you. You matter too.
