Depression manifests differently in kids than it does in adults, which can make it harder to recognise.
While adults tend to show clear signs of sadness, children can express their emotions in more subtle or unexpected ways. Changes in behaviour, mood, or interests can all be signs that something deeper is going on, and it can be serious. After all, as per the Royal College of Paediatrics and Child Health, suicide is one of the lead causes of death in young people. If you notice any of these hidden signs, it might be time to check in and offer support. Kids can experience mental health issues just as grown-ups can, and it’s important to get help for them if you notice them struggling.
1. They seem more irritable than usual.
Depression in children doesn’t always show up as sadness—it can come out as frustration, mood swings, or general irritability. If they seem to snap easily, have sudden outbursts, or get annoyed over small things, it could be a sign that they’re struggling internally. Since children don’t always have the words to explain how they’re feeling, irritation can be their way of expressing discomfort or emotional pain. If this kind of behaviour becomes more frequent or intense, it’s worth looking deeper.
2. Their sleep patterns have changed.
Changes in sleep are a major sign of emotional distress. If a child is suddenly struggling to fall asleep, waking up frequently, or sleeping much more than usual, it could indicate something is wrong. Depression can make children feel exhausted even after a full night’s sleep, or it can keep them up at night with racing thoughts. Either extreme — too much sleep or too little — can be a hidden clue.
3. They’ve lost interest in things they used to love.
If a child suddenly stops enjoying their favourite activities, it can be a warning sign. Whether it’s sports, art, video games, or spending time with friends, a loss of interest in things that used to bring them joy often points to emotional struggles. It’s normal for interests to shift over time, but if the change is sudden and accompanied by withdrawal or disinterest in everything, it could mean they’re feeling numb or disconnected.
4. They complain about physical aches and pains.
Children experiencing depression often express emotional distress through physical symptoms. Frequent headaches, stomach aches, or unexplained body pain can sometimes be signs of underlying mental health issues. If a doctor has ruled out medical causes and these complaints keep coming up, especially alongside other changes in mood or behaviour, it might be worth considering whether depression is playing a role.
5. They isolate themselves more than usual.
All children need alone time, but if they’re avoiding friends, family, or social situations they once enjoyed, it could be a red flag. Depression can make even small interactions feel overwhelming, leading kids to withdraw. Pay attention if they suddenly prefer being alone all the time, stop responding to messages from friends, or avoid family gatherings. Isolation is often a way of coping when they don’t know how to express what they’re feeling.
6. They struggle with concentration or school performance.
If a child is suddenly having trouble focusing, keeping up with schoolwork, or completing tasks they used to handle easily, depression could be a factor. They may seem distracted, forgetful, or uninterested in learning. Depression can make even simple tasks feel overwhelming, and kids may lose motivation to try. A drop in grades or an increase in frustration with schoolwork can be a sign they’re mentally struggling.
7. Their eating habits have changed.
Major changes in appetite — whether eating much more or much less — can be a sign of emotional distress. Some kids lose interest in food when they’re depressed, while others use food as a coping mechanism. If you notice sudden weight changes, skipping meals, or overeating without explanation, it’s worth considering whether emotional struggles are playing a role in their eating habits.
8. They seem unusually tired or lack energy.
Depression can drain a child’s energy, making them seem sluggish, uninterested, or exhausted even when they haven’t done much. If they seem constantly tired despite getting enough sleep, their mental health could be a factor. Fatigue from depression isn’t just about feeling sleepy; it’s an overall lack of motivation and energy that makes even simple activities feel like too much effort.
9. They have trouble managing their emotions.
Children dealing with depression may have a harder time regulating their emotions. They might cry over small things, have sudden mood swings, or struggle with feelings of frustration and sadness they can’t seem to control. Since kids don’t always understand their own emotions, these reactions can sometimes seem out of place or exaggerated. If they’re struggling with emotional ups and downs more than usual, it could be a sign of deeper distress.
10. They talk about feeling hopeless or worthless.
Source: Unsplash Children with depression might express thoughts of hopelessness, low self-esteem, or feeling like they’re “not good enough.” They may say things like, “Nothing matters,” “I’m bad at everything,” or “No one likes me.” Even if these statements seem minor at first, they can indicate deeper feelings of self-doubt and sadness. Pay attention to repeated negative self-talk and try to reassure them while also getting support if you or they need it.
11. They show increased sensitivity to criticism.
Depression can make children more emotionally vulnerable. If they react strongly to small criticisms, take everything personally, or seem overly sensitive to feedback, it might be because they’re already feeling low. While all kids get upset sometimes, extreme sensitivity that seems out of character can be a hidden sign that they’re struggling internally.
12. They engage in risky or reckless behaviour.
Some kids and teens cope with depression by engaging in risky behaviour. This could include breaking rules, acting out at school, experimenting with substances, or pushing boundaries in ways they never did before. While some of this behaviour can seem like typical rebellion, a sudden increase in risky or reckless actions, especially if they seem out of character, can be a sign of deeper emotional struggles.
13. They express thoughts of not wanting to be around anymore.
If a child talks about not wanting to exist, disappearing, or not feeling like life matters, it should always be taken seriously. Even if they don’t directly mention self-harm, expressing these kinds of thoughts can indicate deep emotional pain. If they make statements like “I wish I wasn’t here” or “It wouldn’t matter if I disappeared,” don’t brush it off. These feelings need attention, and getting professional help can be an important step in supporting them. The Young Minds Parents Helpline is available via phone, chat, or email, and can offer guidance and resources when you’re stuck.
