Some conversations are often awkward or uncomfortable, but that doesn’t mean they’re not necessary.
Whether it’s about feelings, relationship issues, work stress, or personal issues, some people find ways to dodge these talks instead of addressing them head-on. They’re not necessarily being intentionally dismissive; sometimes, people avoid deep chats because they don’t know how to deal with them, are afraid of conflict, or simply don’t want to face uncomfortable truths. If you’ve ever tried to have a serious conversation and felt like you were hitting a wall, chances are you’ve heard one of these phrases before.
1. “I don’t want to talk about this right now.”
There are times when this is a fair response because timing does matter. However, if someone consistently uses this every time an important topic comes up, they’re not waiting for the right time—they’re avoiding the conversation altogether. When this happens, a good approach is to ask, “When would be a better time?” If they keep dodging it or never bring it up again, it’s a clear sign they just don’t want to talk about it, period.
2. “You’re overthinking this.”
Sometimes, people do overthink things, but this is often used as a way to make someone feel like their concerns aren’t valid. It’s a quick way to shut down a conversation without actually addressing the issue. If someone tells you this, ask them to explain why they think that. If they can’t give a solid reason or just dismiss your feelings, it’s likely they’re using this to avoid discussing something they’d rather not deal with.
3. “Do we really have to do this now?”
Some people push serious conversations aside by making it seem like the moment is never right. While timing does matter, if they constantly say this and never revisit the discussion, it’s not about bad timing—it’s about avoiding the topic altogether. If this keeps coming up, suggest setting a specific time to talk instead of leaving it open-ended. If they still resist, it’s a sign they’re not planning to have the conversation at all.
4. “I don’t see why this is such a big deal.”
This is dismissive and can be frustrating to hear, especially when the issue is genuinely important to you. Instead of engaging in the conversation, they downplay it, making it seem like you’re overreacting. The best way to respond? Stay calm and explain why it matters to you. If they still refuse to acknowledge your feelings, it may be time to reconsider how willing they are to have open, honest discussions.
5. “Let’s just drop it.”
This is a clear attempt to shut the conversation down immediately. It’s often said in frustration or impatience, with the hope that the other person will let it go. If someone frequently says this, it can create an unhealthy dynamic where problems are never actually addressed. Instead of letting it slide, try saying, “I don’t want to argue, but this is important to me. Can we at least talk about it?”
6. “I don’t know what you want me to say.”
On the surface, this might sound like someone is struggling to find the right words, but often, it’s a way of avoiding responsibility. Instead of engaging in the conversation, they throw it back on you, making it seem like you’re asking for something unreasonable. A better way for them to respond would be, “I don’t know how to respond, but I want to understand.” If they’re not willing to meet you halfway, it’s a sign they’re not interested in having the conversation at all.
7. “Can we just talk about something else?”
This is a polite way of saying, “I don’t want to talk about this at all.” While it’s okay to take a break from a tough discussion, if this is being used repeatedly, it’s likely a way to permanently avoid the topic. If they keep changing the subject, you can acknowledge it by saying, “I know this is uncomfortable, but I don’t want to ignore it. Can we at least talk for a few minutes?”
8. “Why are you making a big deal out of this?”
This is often used to deflect responsibility and make the other person feel like they’re exaggerating. It can be frustrating because it flips the focus from the issue itself to making you feel like your concerns aren’t valid. A good response is, “I’m not making a big deal—I just want to talk about it.” If they still refuse, it might be a sign they don’t take your concerns seriously.
9. “Not this again.”
This suggests that the conversation has been brought up before, but that doesn’t mean it was ever resolved. Instead of engaging in discussion, they make it seem like you’re nagging or repeating yourself unnecessarily. If a conversation keeps coming up, it’s usually because it hasn’t been properly addressed. Ignoring it won’t make the issue go away.
10. “I just don’t have the energy for this.”
Everyone has moments where they feel emotionally drained, but this is often used as an excuse to permanently avoid conversations. If someone always “doesn’t have the energy” for serious talks, they’re likely just dodging the issue. A good way to handle this is to ask, “When do you think you’ll have the energy for it?” If they keep pushing it back, it’s a sign they don’t want to have the discussion at all.
11. “I don’t know what you want from me.”
This is often used as a way to make the other person feel unreasonable. It makes it seem like you’re asking for something impossible, when in reality, you’re just asking for a conversation. If someone says this, try rewording your concerns clearly: “I just want us to talk openly about this.” If they still won’t engage, they may be avoiding accountability.
12. “Can we talk about this later?”
Again, delaying a conversation is sometimes reasonable, but if “later” never comes, it’s just a way to avoid the topic altogether. If this keeps coming up, suggest setting a specific time to talk. If they resist, it’s clear they aren’t interested in addressing the issue.
13. “You’re being too emotional about this.”
This is patronising, dismissive, and can make someone feel like their feelings aren’t valid. Instead of engaging in the discussion, they label the other person as “too emotional,” which takes the focus away from the actual issue. It’s okay to be emotional about things that matter. A good response is, “I feel strongly about this because it’s important to me. Can we talk about it without dismissing my feelings?”
14. “I don’t do well with serious conversations.”
Some people genuinely struggle with emotional discussions, but that doesn’t mean they should avoid them entirely. Relationships and personal growth require honest conversations, even if they’re tough. If someone says this often, encourage them to take small steps toward open discussions rather than avoiding them completely.
15. “This is just how I am.”
This is often used as a way to avoid accountability. Instead of addressing the issue, they make it seem like they can’t change. Everyone is capable of growth, and avoiding conversations by saying, “This is just how I am,” is often just an excuse.
16. “Do we really have to do this?”
Yes, sometimes we do. Tough conversations are part of any relationship, whether personal, romantic, or professional. Brushing things aside might feel easier in the moment, but avoiding serious talks only creates bigger problems in the long run.
