15 Signs Someone In Your Life Is Secretly Unhappy

A lot of people hide their true feelings behind a smile.

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Whether they naturally compartmentalise everything or they simply don’t want to be a burden, there are many reasons people might not be open about the struggles they’re facing. However, if you notice these signs, chances are they’re more unhappy than they’re letting on.

1. Their enthusiasm has faded.

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They used to be the life of the party, but now they seem withdrawn and disinterested. Activities they once enjoyed no longer spark their excitement. Their laughter feels forced, and their eyes lack their usual sparkle. This dimming of their light can be a sign that something deeper is amiss.

2. They’re constantly tired or complaining of physical ailments.

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Unexplained fatigue, frequent headaches, or persistent stomachaches can sometimes be manifestations of emotional distress. If someone is always feeling under the weather, it might be a sign that they’re carrying a heavy emotional burden.

3. Their social habits have changed.

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They’re cancelling plans more often, avoiding social gatherings, or isolating themselves from friends and family. This withdrawal from their usual social circles could indicate that they’re struggling to cope with their emotions and need some space to process their feelings.

4. Their appetite or sleep patterns have changed significantly.

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They might be overeating or skipping meals altogether. Their sleep might be disrupted, with difficulty falling asleep or staying asleep. These changes in their basic needs can signal a deeper emotional imbalance and a need for support.

5. They’re irritable or easily angered.

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Small things that wouldn’t normally bother them now trigger outbursts of anger or frustration. They might be quick to snap at loved ones or seem generally on edge. This increased irritability can be a sign that they’re struggling to manage their emotions and are feeling overwhelmed.

6. They express feelings of hopelessness or worthlessness.

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They might make comments like “Nothing ever goes right for me” or “I’m not good enough.” These self-deprecating remarks can be a red flag that they’re struggling with low self-esteem or even depression. It’s important to take these expressions seriously and offer support.

7. They’re neglecting their appearance or personal hygiene.

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They might stop caring about their appearance, wearing the same clothes day after day, or neglecting basic grooming habits. This lack of self-care can be a sign that they’re feeling overwhelmed and have lost motivation to take care of themselves.

8. They’re using unhealthy coping mechanisms.

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They might be turning to alcohol, drugs, or other addictive behaviours to numb their pain or escape their problems. These unhealthy coping mechanisms can provide temporary relief, but ultimately worsen their emotional state and create additional problems.

9. They’re always criticising themselves and other people.

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They might constantly focus on their flaws and failures, or they might judge other people harshly and unfairly. This negativity can be a reflection of their own inner turmoil and dissatisfaction with their lives.

10. They express a lack of interest in the future.

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They might talk about feeling stuck or trapped, with no hope for the future. They might avoid making plans or setting goals, as they see no point in trying. This lack of motivation and sense of hopelessness can be a serious warning sign.

11. They’re withdrawing from activities they once enjoyed.

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Hobbies and interests that used to bring them joy no longer hold any appeal. They might stop participating in activities they once loved or decline invitations to social events. This loss of interest can be a sign of depression or a general sense of apathy.

12. They’re expressing suicidal thoughts or ideation.

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Any mention of suicide or self-harm should be taken extremely seriously. If someone expresses these thoughts, it’s important to get immediate help. Don’t hesitate to reach out to a crisis hotline or mental health professional.

13. Their behaviour is markedly different from their usual self.

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If you notice a significant change in someone’s personality, mood, or behaviour, it could be a sign that they’re struggling. Trust your instincts and pay attention to any unusual shifts in their demeanour.

14. They’re making jokes about being unhappy or depressed.

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Sometimes, people use humour as a defence mechanism to mask their true feelings. If someone is constantly making jokes about their sadness or lack of motivation, it’s worth checking in with them to see how they’re really doing.

15. They avoid talking about their feelings or personal life.

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They might deflect questions about how they’re doing or change the subject when personal matters come up. This reluctance to open up can be a sign that they’re struggling and don’t feel comfortable sharing their true feelings.