If you’re someone who tends to approach every conversation and relationship with a raised eyebrow, I’m with you.
You might think you have trust issues because you’re hesitant about most people’s reliability, but is it really about a lack of trust or are you just naturally sceptical? Don’t give yourself such a hard time — unless you relate to these things, you’re probably just more naturally carious, and that’s a good thing!
1. You struggle to open up to anyone.
If you keep your thoughts and feelings close to your chest, hiding them even from those closest to you, you might have trust issues. Healthy scepticism doesn’t keep you from getting close to people, after all. It’s okay to be cautious, but if you’re building walls that keep everyone out, it might be more than just being careful.
2. You’re always expecting the worst from people.
Source: Unsplash Trust issues often manifest as a constant expectation that people will let you down or hurt you. If you’re always bracing for betrayal, even from those who’ve never given you reason to doubt them, it’s likely more than scepticism. A sceptical person might be cautious, but they’re open to being proven wrong.
3. You obsess over small details in relationships.
Are you constantly overanalysing every word, action, or text in your relationships? It’s normal to pay attention to the things people say or do, but constant scrutiny of every single element of a conversation suggests trust issues. Healthy scepticism doesn’t consume your thoughts or drive you to dig for hidden meanings in every exchange.
4. You don’t take compliments or positive feedback on board.
If you automatically dismiss praise or positive comments as insincere or manipulative, you might be dealing with trust issues. Sceptical people can accept compliments, even if they don’t immediately take them at face value. If you can never believe anything good said about you, it’s worth figuring out why.
5. You’re quick to assume betrayal.
When something goes wrong in a relationship, do you immediately jump to the conclusion that you’ve been betrayed? Trust issues can make you see disloyalty everywhere, even when there are innocent explanations. Healthy scepticism involves considering all possibilities before making judgements.
6. You don’t like delegating or relying on other people.
If you struggle to let other (perfectly capable) people handle tasks or responsibilities because you’re convinced they’ll mess up or let you down, it could be a sign of trust issues. Sceptical people might verify work, but they’re able to delegate when necessary. If you feel you have to do everything yourself, there’s a problem.
7. You’re constantly looking for hidden motives.
While it’s smart to consider people’s motivations, especially in new relationships, constantly searching for hidden agendas in every interaction is exhausting and often a sign of trust issues. Healthy scepticism allows for the possibility of genuine kindness and straightforward intentions.
8. Forming new relationships is a struggle.
Source: Unsplash If you find it almost impossible to form new friendships or romantic relationships because you’re always waiting for the other shoe to drop, you might be dealing with trust issues. Sceptical people might take their time getting to know someone, but they’re open to new connections.
9. You’re overly suspicious of your partner.
Some level of jealousy is normal, but if you’re constantly accusing your partner of cheating or lying without evidence, it’s likely trust issues at play. Healthy scepticism in a relationship involves open communication, not constant suspicion.
10. You have a hard time believing in systems or institutions.
Source: Unsplash While it’s good to question authority and not blindly trust institutions, if you wouldn’t trust any system or organisation as far as you could throw it, it might be more than healthy scepticism. Trust issues can extend beyond personal relationships to a broader distrust of society.
11. You’re always waiting for things to go wrong.
If you can never relax and enjoy good times because you’re constantly anticipating disaster, it could be a sign of trust issues. Sceptical people can enjoy positive experiences while still being prepared for potential problems. If you’re always on edge, it might be worth exploring why.
12. You have difficulty accepting help from others.
Source: Unsplash Struggling to accept help, even when you need it, can be a sign of trust issues. If you believe that accepting it will lead to being taken advantage of or let down, it’s more than just being cautious. Healthy scepticism allows for accepting help while still maintaining boundaries.
13. You’re overly private about your personal life.
Source: Unsplash It’s normal to have boundaries, of course, but if you’re excessively secretive about your personal life, even with close friends or family, it might point to trust issues. Sceptical people can share personal information judiciously, but those with trust issues often keep everyone at arm’s length.
14. You have a history of being let down or betrayed.
Source: Unsplash Past experiences significantly shape our ability to trust. If you’ve been hurt or betrayed in the past, especially repeatedly, it’s natural to develop trust issues. However, it’s important to recognise that these past experiences don’t define all future relationships.
15. You’re willing to work on building trust.
Source: Unsplash Ironically, recognising that you have trust issues and being willing to work on them is a positive sign because it shows self-awareness and a desire for healthier relationships. If you’re open to challenging your trust issues and working towards more balanced relationships, you’re already on the path to healthier interactions. Remember, it’s okay to be cautious, but it’s also important to be open to trust when it’s earned.
