Good friendships don’t need grand gestures. Most of the time, it’s the simple, low-key stuff that builds closeness without either of you having to try too hard. If you’re looking to deepen your friendships, it’s less about doing more and more about showing up in ways that actually matter. Here are 12 small, human ways to strengthen your friendships without turning it into a full-time job.
Send them a random memory.
Texting a friend something like “remember when we…” is one of the quickest ways to reconnect. It shows you think of them, and that your shared moments still mean something to you, even if it was years ago. It doesn’t have to be deep. It can be dumb, funny, weird, or sweet. Nostalgia is underrated, and people love being reminded of the role they’ve played in your life.
Say what you actually admire about them.
We’re so used to complimenting each other on outfits or achievements, but the real friendship glue is stuff like “you always make people feel welcome” or “you’re ridiculously brave and probably don’t even realise it.” It might feel awkward at first, but genuine compliments hit different when they’re about character. It helps people feel truly seen, which creates a deeper bond.
Be consistent, even if it’s low-effort.
You don’t have to send long messages or check in daily. But being the friend who replies, follows up, or sends the “thinking of you” text makes a big difference. It’s not about intensity—it’s about showing that you’re there. Friendships grow through repetition, not one-off emotional downloads.
Invite them into your “normal” life.
Sure, going out is fun, but some of the best bonding happens when you fold laundry together, run errands, or just hang out without a plan. Letting friends see the boring parts builds real closeness. It sends the message that they don’t have to be constantly entertaining or impressive around you, which is a huge trust-builder on both sides. Plus, it encourages them to include you in their life in the same way, and that’s what friendship is all about.
Ask questions no one else is asking.
Everyone asks how work is going or what plans you’ve got next weekend. But the questions that deepen friendships are often the ones slightly to the left of obvious. Try something along the lines of, “What’s something you’ve been thinking about a lot lately?” or “Is there anything you’ve wanted to do but haven’t told anyone?” You’ll be surprised how quickly the vibe deepens.
Remember the little details.
When someone tells you they’ve got a stressful week coming up, make a note. Then send a quick message the day before just to say you’re thinking of them. You don’t have to make grand gestures of support—it’s about showing you were really listening. Those little check-ins stick in people’s minds far longer than we think, especially since most people wouldn’t give them a second thought.
Let them show up for you, too.
It’s easy to play the strong, supportive friend, but letting people see your mess or ask for help now and then actually deepens connection. It makes things feel more mutual. Being vulnerable doesn’t mean dumping every detail. It just means being real. Plus, it lets your friends feel needed, which is something most people want more than they admit.
Make space for silence.
You don’t always need to fill every pause with chatter. Being able to sit in silence with someone and not feel awkward is a sign of comfort, and building that comfort is what brings friendships deeper. It’s especially true when someone’s going through a rough time. Sometimes your quiet presence does more than all the advice in the world.
Say sorry when you mess up (without making it about you).
Everyone messes up—forgetting to text back, being a bit snappy, or missing something important. The friendships that last are the ones where you own it simply and honestly. No need for a dramatic apology. A quick “hey, I realise I didn’t handle that well—sorry about that” goes a long way. It keeps resentment from building and shows you value the friendship more than your ego.
Include them in things even if they say no.
Sometimes people pull away not because they don’t care, but because they’re dealing with their own stuff. Keep inviting them, even if they haven’t come out in a while. It shows that the door’s still open, and you haven’t taken it personally. That calm consistency can mean everything to someone who’s feeling off. After all, even if they can’t or won’t come, it always feels nice to be included.
Get properly excited about their wins, and celebrate them!
When something good happens to or for your friend, hype them up. Send the “I’m so proud of you” text, buy the tiny bottle of fizz, or share their thing online if that’s their vibe. Genuine excitement builds connection. And being someone who celebrates other people, without jealousy or competition, is the kind of energy people want to stay close to. You should know there’s enough room for everyone to win, and you truly love it when it happens to someone you care about.
Be the one who follows up later.
If they told you they had a big meeting or something difficult going on, check back in a few days later. It doesn’t have to be deep—just “how did it go?” shows you actually care beyond the moment. Most people forget to circle back. When you’re the one who remembers, it stands out, and it tells your friend they’re not just background noise in your life. They’ll know you’re someone who can be relied on, and that means the world.
