Forget 'I Love You' – Here's What Your Partner Really Wants to Hear

Envato Elements

You might think that saying “I love you” is the be-all and end-all of expressing affection, but the truth is, your partner wants to hear a whole lot more than that.

Those three little words can start to feel like a broken record if you don’t back them up with actions and other meaningful phrases. If you really want to make your partner feel valued, appreciated, and understood, you need to dig deeper. Here are 15 things your partner really wants to hear from you.

1. “I’m proud of you.”

Everyone wants to feel like their accomplishments and efforts are recognised and celebrated, especially by the person they love most. Telling your partner that you’re proud of them shows that you notice and appreciate all the hard work they put in, whether it’s at their job, in their hobbies, or in your relationship. It’s a way of saying, “I see you, and I think you’re amazing.” Don’t just wait for the big milestones, either — celebrate the small victories, too.

2. “I’m here for you.”

Life can be tough sometimes, and knowing that you have a supportive partner by your side can make all the difference. Telling your partner “I’m here for you” lets them know that they don’t have to face their struggles alone, that you’re willing to listen, offer advice, or just be a shoulder to cry on. It’s a way of showing that you’re committed to being their rock, no matter what challenges come your way.

3. “I understand.”

Feeling understood is a fundamental human need, and it’s especially important in romantic relationships. When your partner is sharing their thoughts, feelings, or experiences with you, don’t just nod along or wait for your turn to speak. Really try to put yourself in their shoes and see things from their perspective. Saying “I understand” (and meaning it) shows that you’re making an effort to empathise with them and validate their feelings.

4. “I appreciate you.”

It’s easy to start taking your partner for granted, especially if you’ve been together for a long time. But everyone wants to feel appreciated for who they are and what they do. Make a habit of telling your partner what you appreciate about them, whether it’s their kindness, their sense of humour, their cooking skills, or the way they always know how to cheer you up. Be specific and sincere, and watch their face light up.

5. “I trust you.”

Trust is the foundation of any healthy relationship, but it’s not something that should be assumed or taken for granted. Telling your partner “I trust you” is a way of affirming that foundation and showing that you have faith in them. It means you believe in their integrity, their judgment, and their commitment to your relationship. It’s a powerful statement that can help your partner feel secure and valued.

6. “I respect you.”

Respect is another crucial component of a strong relationship, but it’s not always expressed as often as it should be. Telling your partner “I respect you” shows that you admire and value them as an individual, not just as an extension of yourself. It means you appreciate their opinions, their boundaries, and their autonomy. It’s a way of showing that you see them as an equal partner in your relationship.

7. “I’m sorry.”

No one is perfect, and even the healthiest relationships have their fair share of conflicts and misunderstandings. When you’ve done something wrong or hurtful, don’t be too proud to apologise. Saying “I’m sorry” (and meaning it) shows that you’re willing to take responsibility for your actions and work towards repairing any damage done. It’s a sign of maturity, humility, and respect for your partner’s feelings.

8. “I forgive you.”

On the flip side, when your partner apologises for something they’ve done wrong, don’t hold a grudge or make them grovel. Saying “I forgive you” shows that you’re willing to let go of resentment and move forward together. It doesn’t mean you’re excusing their behaviour or forgetting what happened, but rather that you’re choosing to prioritise your relationship over your ego. Forgiveness is a gift that can strengthen your bond and help you grow together.

9. “Thank you.”

Gratitude is a powerful force in relationships, but it’s often overlooked in the daily grind of life. Make a habit of saying “thank you” to your partner, not just for the big things like gifts or grand gestures, but for the small, everyday acts of kindness and support. Thank them for making dinner, for listening to you vent, for picking up your favourite snack at the store. Showing appreciation for the little things can make a big difference in how loved and valued your partner feels.

10. “I love the way you…”

Compliments are always nice to hear, but generic ones like “you’re so beautiful/handsome/smart” can start to feel a bit shallow after a while. Instead, try to be specific about what you love and admire about your partner. “I love the way you light up when you talk about your passions.” “I love the way you make me laugh even when I’m having a rough day.” “I love the way you always know just what to say to make me feel better.” These targeted compliments show that you’re paying attention and appreciating the unique qualities that make your partner who they are.

11. “What do you need from me right now?”

Sometimes, the best thing you can say to your partner is a question rather than a statement. Asking them “What do you need from me right now?” shows that you’re attuned to their needs and willing to support them in whatever way they require. Maybe they need a listening ear, a hug, some space, or some practical help with a task. By asking instead of assuming, you’re giving them the chance to communicate their needs and feel heard.

12. “I feel safe with you.”

Feeling safe and secure is a fundamental need in any relationship, but it’s not always easy to come by. Telling your partner “I feel safe with you” is a way of expressing that you trust them completely, not just physically but emotionally as well. It means you feel like you can be your true self around them, without fear of judgment or rejection. It’s a powerful statement of intimacy and vulnerability that can deepen your bond.

13. “You inspire me.”

Having a partner who inspires you to be your best self is a rare and precious gift. Telling your partner “You inspire me” is a way of acknowledging the positive impact they’ve had on your life. Maybe they inspire you to be kinder, more ambitious, more adventurous, or more honest with yourself. Maybe they inspire you to pursue your dreams or overcome your fears. Whatever it is, let them know that their presence in your life has made you a better person.

14. “I’m looking forward to the future with you.”

In a world that’s often filled with uncertainty and change, it’s comforting to know that you have a partner who’s in it for the long haul. Telling your partner “I’m looking forward to the future with you” shows that you see them as a permanent part of your life, and that you’re excited about all the adventures and challenges you’ll face together. It’s a way of expressing your commitment and your optimism about what lies ahead.

15. “I choose you.”

At the end of the day, love isn’t just a feeling — it’s a choice. Telling your partner “I choose you” is a way of reaffirming that choice and showing that you’re intentional about your relationship. It means that out of all the billions of people on this planet, you’ve decided that they’re the one you want to build a life with. It’s not just about fate or circumstance — it’s about actively, consciously choosing to love and make them a priority them every day.