Holding a conversation with intimidating people can be a terrifying experience.
You don’t want to say the wrong thing or sound like an idiot, but you also don’t want to come off as try-hard and too eager to please. The key is confidence, but that’s often easier said than done. Here’s how to feel more self-assured in these chats.
1. Remember they’re human too.
They’ve got insecurities and bad hair days, just like everyone else. Keeping this in mind can help you see them as a fellow human rather than some untouchable deity. Next time you’re feeling intimidated, just imagine them in their pyjamas, eating cereal straight from the box.
2. Do your homework.
Before you dive into that conversation, do a bit of research. What are their interests? What projects have they worked on? It’s like preparing for an exam, except the reward is a great conversation instead of a passing grade. Just don’t go overboard — nobody likes a know-it-all!
3. Focus on your strengths.
Everyone’s got their own superpowers. Instead of dwelling on what they’ve achieved, remind yourself of your own unique skills and experiences. Your confidence in your own abilities can shine through in your conversation.
4. Practice power posing.
Before your big chat, try striking a power pose. Stand tall, shoulders back, hands on hips — channel your inner superhero. Hold it for a couple of minutes. It might feel silly, but studies show it can boost your confidence levels.
5. Prepare some questions.
Having a few questions ready can be your secret weapon. It takes the pressure off you to carry the conversation and shows you’re interested in what they have to say. Just make sure your questions are genuine and relevant.
6. Find common ground.
Even if you seem worlds apart, there’s usually something you have in common. Finding that shared interest can help you connect on a more personal level. It’s like discovering you’re both part of the same secret club.
7. Listen actively.
Good conversation isn’t about being a brilliant talker, it’s about being a great listener. Pay attention to what they’re saying, nod, make eye contact. Ask follow-up questions based on what they’ve said. Not only does this take some pressure off you, but it also shows you’re engaged and interested.
8. Use humour (carefully).
A well-timed joke can be a great ice-breaker and tension-diffuser. But know your audience. Keep it light, self-deprecating if necessary, and avoid anything too controversial. And if your joke falls flat? Laugh it off.
9. Mind your body language.
Stand (or sit) up straight, make eye contact, and try to avoid nervous habits like fidgeting or crossing your arms. Smile — it makes you appear more confident and approachable. Mirroring their body language subtly can create a sense of rapport.
10. Take deep breaths.
Feeling your heart race? Take a moment to breathe deeply. It’s like your body’s very own chill pill. Slow, deep breaths can help calm your nerves and clear your mind.
11. Embrace the awkward.
If you fumble your words or there’s an uncomfortable silence, don’t panic. Laugh it off or acknowledge it with a light comment. Owning the awkwardness can actually make you seem more confident and relatable.
12. Focus on the conversation, not your anxiety.
Try to stay present and engaged in what’s being said. Think of it like watching a really gripping TV show — you’re too absorbed in the plot to worry about anything else.
13. Remember, they might be nervous too.
Source: Unsplash That intimidating person might be just as nervous as you are! Remembering that they might be feeling some jitters too can help level the playing field in your mind.
14. Celebrate your wins.
Did you manage to have a conversation without tripping over your words? That’s a win! Give yourself a pat on the back. Confidence is like a muscle — the more you exercise it, the stronger it gets.
