Turning down invites is fine and well until there’s that one party you just can’t get out of for love nor money.
Whether it’s a family member’s birthday celebrations or a colleague’s leaving do, sometimes you’re just going to have to show up and smile, even if you really don’t want to. Dreading it isn’t going to make it come and go any faster, so here’s how to make the whole experience a little less painful.
1. Reframe your mindset about the event.
Instead of focusing on the negatives, try to find something positive about the party. Maybe there’s a chance to catch up with an old friend or enjoy some good food. Shifting your perspective can make the event seem less daunting.
2. Plan your exit strategy in advance.
Knowing you have a way out can make the party feel more manageable. Decide on a reasonable time to leave and stick to it. You might even arrange for a friend to give you a call as an “excuse” to leave early if needed.
3. Choose an outfit that makes you feel confident.
Wear something that you feel comfortable and good in. When you like how you look, it can boost your confidence and make social interactions easier. Plus, you’ll have one less thing to worry about on the day.
4. Prepare some conversation topics beforehand.
Think of a few general topics you can discuss — urrent events, popular TV shows, or upcoming holidays. Having these in your back pocket can help ease those awkward silences and make mingling less stressful.
5. Bring a friend or a plus-one if possible.
Having a familiar face by your side can provide a sense of security. If the invitation allows, bring someone who can support you and make the event more enjoyable. They can also help you navigate social situations.
6. Set realistic expectations for yourself.
Remember, you don’t have to be the life of the party. It’s okay to be quiet or to take breaks if you’re feeling overwhelmed. Set small, achievable goals like talking to three new people or staying for an hour.
7. Practice some calming techniques.
Learn a few simple breathing exercises or mindfulness techniques you can use discreetly at the party. These can help you stay grounded if you start feeling anxious or uncomfortable.
8. Plan a reward for yourself after the event.
Give yourself something to look forward to after the party. It could be watching your favourite film, ordering takeaway, or simply having some quiet time alone. This can motivate you to get through the event.
9. Arrive a bit late to avoid awkward early moments.
If it’s not a formal event with a set start time, consider arriving a little late. This way, you can avoid the initial awkwardness and join when the party is already in full swing.
10. Find a role or task to keep yourself occupied.
Offer to help the host with something, like serving drinks or setting up food. Having a job to do can give you a sense of purpose and help you feel less awkward about mingling.
11. Limit alcohol consumption if you’re feeling anxious.
While it might be tempting to drink to calm your nerves, too much alcohol can actually increase anxiety. If you choose to drink, do so in moderation and alternate with water.
12. Give yourself permission to leave if it becomes too much.
Remember, it’s okay to leave if you’re truly uncomfortable. Your wellbeing is important, and there’s no shame in excusing yourself politely if you need to.
13. Focus on being kind rather than being impressive.
Instead of worrying about how you come across, concentrate on being kind to people. Offer compliments, listen attentively, and show interest in people. This can take the pressure off you and make interactions more genuine.
14. Reflect on the positive aspects afterwards.
After the party, take a moment to acknowledge what went well, no matter how small. Maybe you had a nice conversation or enjoyed the music. Recognising these positives can help you feel better about future social events.