By If you’re good at reading people, chances are you have a good idea whether or not someone likes you.
However, sometimes people will pretend to like you, whether because it would make things awkward if they were honest about their feelings or because they have something to gain from keeping you on side. So, how can you tell when someone’s not being genuine? Here are some signs they’re not your biggest fan but don’t want to say so.
1. They keep saying “We should hang out sometime” but never follow through.
You know the drill. They’re always talking about how you two should get together, but when it comes to actually making plans? Crickets. If they were really into you, they’d make the effort to see you. Actions speak louder than words, after all.
2. Their texts are always short and to the point.
Source: Unsplash If their texts look more like telegrams than conversations, it’s not a great sign. One-word answers and long gaps between replies? Yeah, they’re probably not that excited to chat with you. Someone who’s genuinely interested will want to keep the conversation flowing.
3. They only contact you when they need something.
Source: Unsplash Ugh, this one’s a classic. If they only pop up in your messages when they need a favour, or they’re bored, you’re probably just a convenience to them. A real friend or potential partner will want to talk to you just because, not only when it benefits them.
4. They’re always “too busy” to meet up.
Look, we’re all busy. But if someone’s constantly using this excuse, they’re probably just not that into you. When you really like someone, you make time for them, even if it’s just a quick coffee between errands.
5. They never ask you personal questions.
If your conversations feel one-sided, with you doing all the asking and them doing all the talking, that’s not great. Someone who’s genuinely interested in you will want to know more about you – your likes, dislikes, dreams, the works.
6. They’re always on their phone when you’re together.
Nothing says, “I’d rather be somewhere else” like someone who can’t put their phone down when they’re with you. If they’re constantly scrolling through social media or texting other people, they’re not really present in the moment with you.
7. They never make concrete plans for the future.
Source: Unsplash If all their talk about future plans is vague and non-committal, they’re probably not seeing you in their long-term picture. Someone who’s really into you will be excited to make actual plans, even if it’s just for next week.
8. They only contact you late at night.
Late night “you up?” texts are not a sign of genuine interest. If they only want to talk or meet up late at night, they’re probably just looking for a hookup, not a real connection.
9. They’re flaky and often cancel plans last minute.
Stuff happens, sure. But if they’re constantly bailing on you at the last minute, it’s a sign that you’re not a priority for them. Someone who respects you will respect your time too.
10. They never introduce you to their friends or family.
If you’ve been hanging out for a while, and they still haven’t introduced you to anyone in their life, that’s a red flag. When someone’s serious about you, they want to integrate you into their world.
11. They’re hot and cold.
One day, they’re super into you, the next they’re distant. This rollercoaster of emotions is not a sign of genuine interest. It’s more likely they’re playing games or just not sure what they want.
12. They always talk about their ex.
If they can’t stop bringing up their ex, whether it’s to complain or reminisce, they’re probably not over them. And that means they’re not really available for a new relationship with you.
13. They never compliment you or show appreciation.
When someone’s into you, they notice the little things. If they never seem to notice your new haircut, or thank you for your efforts, they’re probably not that invested in you.
14. They’re always comparing you to other people.
Constant comparisons, especially unfavourable ones, are a big no-no. If they’re always talking about how their ex or someone else does things better, they’re not appreciating you for who you are.
15. They avoid physical contact.
I’m not talking about full-on PDA here, but if they consistently dodge even casual physical contact like a hug or a touch on the arm, they might not be feeling a connection.
16. They never remember important details about you.
If you’ve told them multiple times about your nut allergy or your sister’s name, and they still can’t remember, they’re probably not paying attention because they’re not really interested.
17. They’re always talking about how busy or stressed they are.
While life can get hectic, constantly harping on about how busy or stressed they are is often code for “I don’t have time for you.” Someone who’s into you will try to involve you in their life, even during busy times.
