Growing up doesn’t automatically mean you’re acting like a mature adult.
No matter how many years you’ve been alive, that doesn’t necessarily mean that you’ve gained the wisdom, self-awareness, and composure to handle life in a responsible and level-headed way. In fact, if you’re guilty of these bad behaviours, it seems like you’ve still got some growing up to do. Don’t worry — with a bit of effort, you can change!
1. You don’t take responsibility for the things you do wrong.
Blaming anyone and everyone else for your mistakes or constantly making excuses is a clear sign of immaturity. A mature adult owns up to their actions and learns from them. Next time something goes wrong, try saying, “I messed up — how can I make this right?” It’s a simple step that shows growth and builds trust with the people around you.
2. You have no control over your emotions.
If you often lose your temper, break down over minor issues, or let your emotions control your decisions, it might be time to work on emotional regulation. Maturity means responding rather than reacting. Take a deep breath before you speak or make a decision. Giving yourself a moment can help you respond calmly and thoughtfully.
3. You run away from tough conversations.
Dodging uncomfortable discussions or ghosting people when things get tough shows a lack of maturity. Adults face issues head-on, even when it’s awkward. Try approaching tough conversations with honesty and empathy. You’ll feel better afterwards, and it strengthens your relationships.
4. You expect instant gratification.
If you want everything now and struggle to wait or work for long-term goals, it might be holding you back. Patience and persistence are hallmarks of adulthood. Set small, achievable milestones and celebrate them along the way. This helps you stay focused and shows you’re willing to put in the effort.
5. You spend a lot of time gossiping.
Spreading rumours or talking behind people’s backs is a sign of immaturity. Mature adults focus on their own lives and avoid drama. Next time you’re tempted to gossip, ask yourself, “Does this benefit anyone?” If the answer is no, steer the conversation in a more positive direction.
6. You hold grudges over silly things and refuse to forgive.
Clinging to resentment hurts you more than anyone else. Maturity involves learning to forgive and let go. You don’t have to forget or condone the behaviour, but releasing the anger frees you up for healthier relationships. Practise saying, “I forgive you,” even if it’s just to yourself.
7. You make everything about you.
If you constantly steer conversations back to yourself or dismiss other people’s feelings, it’s time for a change. A mature person listens and is actually interested in other people. Try asking more questions and really listening to the answers. Being present for people makes your relationships more balanced and meaningful.
8. You avoid commitments and responsibilities.
Dodging obligations — whether it’s work tasks, plans with friends, or life goals — suggests a lack of maturity. Adults follow through on their commitments. Start small by setting reminders and holding yourself accountable. Meeting your responsibilities boosts confidence and shows everyone they can rely on you.
9. You constantly compare yourself to everyone else.
Measuring your worth by comparing yourself to other people is a sign of insecurity and immaturity. Mature adults focus on their own growth and progress. When you feel the urge to compare, remind yourself that everyone’s journey is different. Celebrate your own achievements, big and small.
10. You rely on other people to solve your problems.
If your first instinct is to call someone to fix things for you, it might be time to step up. Mature adults face challenges and try to solve problems independently. Next time you hit a snag, ask yourself, “What can I do to handle this?” Taking initiative builds resilience and confidence.
11. You can’t bring yourself to apologise and mean it.
A weak apology or refusal to say sorry can be a sign of pride or insecurity. Maturity involves recognising when you’re wrong and making amends. A simple, “I’m sorry, I was wrong,” goes a long way. A genuine apology shows strength and a willingness to improve.
12. You regularly overspend and can’t budget to save your life.
Blowing through your money without thinking about the future isn’t the most mature approach. Adults plan and manage their finances responsibly. Start by tracking your spending and setting a monthly budget. Having control over your money gives you freedom and peace of mind.
13. You procrastinate on important tasks.
Putting off important work until the last minute can hurt your productivity and increase stress. Mature adults prioritise tasks and manage their time effectively. Break projects into smaller steps and tackle them one at a time. Progress, no matter how small, keeps you moving forward.
14. You lack boundaries in your relationships.
Letting people walk all over you or, conversely, being too controlling shows a lack of boundaries. Maturity means knowing your limits and respecting everyone else’s. Practise saying “no” when needed and honouring other people’s boundaries. Healthy boundaries lead to healthier relationships.
15. You refuse to learn from your mistakes.
Everyone messes up, but refusing to reflect or learn from those mistakes is a sign of immaturity. A mature adult acknowledges their missteps and uses them as opportunities to grow. Next time something goes wrong, ask yourself, “What can I learn from this?” Growth happens when you turn mistakes into lessons.
