It’s wild how much power lives in the way we speak.
You could have the best ideas in the room, but if the way you present them is full of apologies, fillers, or little disclaimers, people stop hearing the message and start focusing on your delivery. Saying these things might seem harmless, even polite, but they often make you sound less confident than you are. If you want to be taken seriously at work, in relationships, or just in everyday conversations, it’s time to retire a few lines that quietly undermine your presence.
1. “I could be wrong, but…”
Of course you could be wrong. Everyone could be. However, starting with this makes it sound like you don’t even believe in what you’re saying. It softens your voice before it’s even heard. Try replacing it with, “Here’s how I see it,” or “What I’ve noticed is…” It sounds grounded, not arrogant. You’re still being open to other views—you’re just not shrinking before you speak.
2. “Sorry, but…”
This one usually gets used when you’re about to say something totally reasonable, like asking for clarity or pointing out a mistake. But leading with “sorry” makes it sound like you think your voice is an inconvenience. You don’t need to apologise for speaking. Start with “I’d like to add something,” or “Can I ask a question?” It’s assertive, not aggressive, and it keeps the focus on your actual point, not your apology.
3. “Does that make sense?”
This might feel like you’re being helpful, but it actually sounds like you’re second-guessing your own clarity. It moves the burden to the other person to validate whether you explained something well. Instead, try “Let me know if you want me to clarify anything.” It keeps the door open without making it sound like you’re unsure of yourself.
4. “I just think…”
The word “just” is like a tiny permission slip to sound smaller. “I just think we should…” or “I just wanted to say…” weakens whatever comes after. It’s a subtle way of stepping back instead of standing in your point. Drop the “just.” Say, “I think we should…” or “I want to say…” and feel the difference. You’re not barging in. You’re simply owning your perspective.
5. “I’m not an expert, but…”
Unless you’re presenting scientific findings on live television, you don’t need to preface everything with your credentials. This phrase often shows up when people know what they’re talking about—but are scared to sound too confident. You can share your thoughts without disqualifying yourself. Say, “From what I’ve seen…” or “In my experience…” It sounds informed, not insecure.
6. “No worries if not!”
This one’s a favourite in emails and casual requests, but it can backfire. It makes it sound like what you’re asking doesn’t really matter, even when it does. It gives people an easy out, but sometimes at the expense of your own needs. There’s nothing wrong with being polite. But try, “Let me know if that works for you” instead. It’s still kind, but more confident—and shows you value your own time.
7. “I hate to ask, but…”
Asking for something you need shouldn’t come with guilt. This one frames your request as an imposition, which makes it easier for people to dismiss or deprioritise it. Instead, be direct with kindness. Say, “Would you be open to…” or “Is now a good time to…” You’re still being thoughtful—you’re just not making yourself sound like a burden.
8. “I was just wondering if maybe…”
This is a triple hit of hesitation. “Just,” “wondering,” and “maybe” all dilute your message until there’s barely anything left. It sounds like you’re trying to disappear into your own sentence. Try, “Can we discuss…” or “I’d like to ask…” If you’ve got a question or request, get to it. You’re not asking for too much—you’re asking like someone who believes they deserve a response.
9. “You probably already know this, but…”
It sounds humble, but it actually makes your point feel irrelevant before it lands. You’ve already told the listener it’s unnecessary, so why would they pay attention? If it’s important enough to say, just say it. You can offer context without devaluing your input. Try, “This might be familiar, but here’s how I see it.” That keeps it useful without undercutting yourself.
10. “I don’t know if this is a good idea, but…”
Confidence doesn’t mean being right all the time—it means being willing to share ideas without fear of them being perfect. This one makes it sound like even you don’t trust your own thinking. Instead, try, “Here’s an idea—see what you think.” It invites collaboration without making you sound unsure. A good idea doesn’t need a shaky intro to be heard.
11. “This is probably a dumb question, but…”
No one hears what comes after this. All they hear is that you don’t trust yourself to ask a valid question. And the worst part? The question is rarely ever dumb, but you’ve made it sound that way. Try, “Quick question,” or “Can I clarify something?” It’s simple, clean, and respectful to both yourself and the other person’s time.
12. “I’ll just go with whatever everyone else wants.”
Source: Unsplash This might seem easy-going, but it often sounds like you don’t care—or worse, like you don’t think your input matters. In groups, it can make you invisible, even if you have great instincts. You don’t need to dominate the plan. Try, “I’m open, but I’d suggest…” or “Happy to go with the group, but here’s my vote.” It keeps you in the conversation, not sidelined from it.
13. “I know this probably isn’t important, but…”
Leading with this tells people to tune out before you’ve even started. If you’re bringing it up, there’s a reason. So, why frame it as irrelevant? You can flag something without minimising it. Try, “This might be worth looking at,” or “Something small I noticed…” It leaves the door open without closing it on yourself.
14. “Sorry for taking up your time.”
Unless you’re delivering a six-hour TED Talk out of nowhere, you don’t need to apologise for speaking. Everyone’s time matters—including yours. This phrase instantly puts you in a lower-status position. Instead, end with “Thanks for your time,” or “Appreciate you listening.” Gratitude holds more weight than guilt, and it subtly reminds people that your words were worth hearing.
15. “I’ll probably mess this up, but…”
This is a self-fulfilling prophecy in disguise. You’re lowering the bar for yourself before you’ve even started, and other people will take that as permission to lower their expectations too. Try, “This is new for me, but I’m giving it a shot.” You’re still being real, but you’re framing it as growth, not failure. There’s a big difference.
16. “Ignore me if this is stupid…”
Why would anyone listen if you tell them not to? This kind of self-cancelling language makes it harder for people to respect what you’re saying, even if it’s spot on. You can be casual without being dismissive. Try, “Throwing this out there…” or “Here’s one thought—curious what you think.” It’s relaxed, but still confident, and it gives your ideas the respect they deserve.
