While you don’t expect a round of applause every time you do something nice for someone, a little appreciation every once in a while would be nice.
No one wants to feel like their efforts are being taken for granted, but it happens pretty often in relationships. After a while, it can really start to wear you down and change the way you feel and behave. If you’re going through these things, chances are, you’re in need of a bit of appreciation in your life.
1. You find yourself constantly looking for validation from other people.
If you’re always fishing for compliments or reassurance, it might be because you’re not getting enough appreciation in your daily life. Chasing approval from other people can be exhausting, both for you and the people around you. After all, true appreciation should come naturally, not because you’ve hinted for it a million times.
2. You’re putting in extra hours, but no one seems to notice.
You’re burning the midnight oil, working weekends, and going above and beyond, but it feels like you might as well be invisible. A lack of recognition for your hard work can be incredibly demoralising. You might start wondering if all this extra effort is even worth it, which is never a good place to be in your work life.
3. Your ideas are often overlooked or dismissed.
You come up with brilliant suggestions in meetings, but they’re met with crickets. Then, a week later, someone else presents the same idea and suddenly, it’s the best thing since sliced bread. It’s like you’re speaking a different language that no one else understands.
4. You’re always the one people turn to for help, but rarely get thanked.
You’re everyone’s go-to person when they need a hand, but the words “thank you” seem to have vanished from their vocabulary. People just take what they need and walk away, creating a one-sided dynamic that can leave you feeling used and unappreciated. Does anyone even value your time and effort? It doesn’t feel like it.
5. You’re always comparing your situation to other people’s.
You can’t help but notice how your colleagues or friends seem to get praised for the smallest things, while your big achievements go unnoticed. Constantly comparing yourself can be a sign that you’re not feeling appreciated in your own right, and it can seriously mess with your self-esteem.
6. You’re hesitant to share your accomplishments because you don’t want to seem braggy.
When you do something great, you keep it to yourself because you’re worried about coming across as a show-off. Being reluctant to celebrate your wins can stem from feeling that other people don’t genuinely appreciate your efforts, so why bother mentioning them? Of course, if you don’t toot your own horn once in a while, no one else might.
7. You feel like your personal time isn’t respected.
It seems like everyone expects you to be available 24/7, whether it’s work emails at midnight or friends asking for favours during your me-time. It’s as if your personal time is a public resource that anyone can tap into. The lack of boundaries can make you feel like your need for rest and relaxation isn’t appreciated or respected.
8. You’re consistently passed over for promotions or opportunities.
Despite your hard work and dedication, you keep watching others climb the ladder while you’re left on the ground floor. Continually being overlooked (or feeling like you are) can make you feel like your work and potential aren’t truly appreciated, leading to frustration and a sense of stagnation in your career.
9. You do more than your fair share in relationships.
Whether it’s in friendships, romantic relationships, or family dynamics, you’re always the one putting in more effort. This imbalance can leave you feeling taken for granted and underappreciated, wondering if anyone values the effort you put into maintaining these relationships.
10. You’re constantly apologising, even for things that aren’t your fault.
You’re always saying “sorry” for everything, even when you’ve done nothing wrong. It’s like you’re walking on eggshells, trying to avoid any potential criticism. The thing is, over-apologising can be a sign that you don’t feel appreciated for who you are, leading you to constantly try to smooth things over or make yourself smaller to avoid rocking the boat.
11. You feel guilty about taking time off or saying no to requests.
The thought of taking a day off or turning down a request fills you with dread. This guilt can stem from feeling that your own needs and boundaries aren’t appreciated or respected by other people, leaving you constantly prioritising everyone else over yourself. That’s going to come back to bite you, for sure.
12. You’re experiencing burnout or feeling emotionally exhausted.
You’re running on fumes, feeling drained both physically and emotionally. Burnout is a clear sign that you’re not getting the appreciation and support you need to recharge. When your efforts go unrecognised, it’s easy to push yourself to the brink trying to prove your worth.
13. You’re always daydreaming about dramatic scenarios where people finally appreciate you.
You catch yourself imagining situations where you quit your job dramatically or have a big confrontation with friends or family, finally making them realise how much you do. These fantasies can be a way of coping with feelings of being underappreciated, giving you the recognition you crave, even if it’s just in your imagination.
14. You’re becoming increasingly resentful towards the people around you.
You’ve started harbouring negative feelings towards colleagues, friends, or family members, and it’s like a slow-burning fire of resentment is growing inside you. This bitterness often stems from feeling that your efforts and contributions are consistently undervalued or taken for granted. If left unchecked, this resentment can poison your relationships and overall outlook on life.
15. You’re losing motivation to go above and beyond.
Where you once took pride in giving 110%, now you find yourself thinking, “Why bother?” It’s like the spark that used to drive you has fizzled out. A loss of motivation is a common symptom of feeling underappreciated. When your efforts consistently go unnoticed or unrewarded, it’s natural to start questioning the point of putting in extra effort.
16. You find it hard to accept compliments when they do come your way.
On the rare occasions when someone does praise you, you brush it off or don’t believe it. Not being able to accept positive feedback can be a sign that you’ve internalised feelings of being underappreciated, making it hard to believe that anyone truly values your contributions.
17. You’re considering major life changes just to feel valued.
You’re daydreaming about quitting your job, ending relationships, or making drastic changes in your life, all in the hope of finding appreciation elsewhere. While change can be good, making major decisions purely out of a need for appreciation can be risky. It’s important to address the root cause of these feelings before making life-altering choices.
