Struggling with mental health can be tough enough on its own, but the fear of opening up about it often brings its own set of challenges.
According to Mind UK, one in four people in the UK will experience a mental health issue in a given year, which proves just how common it is. However, that doesn’t make it any easier to talk about for many people. Whether it’s due to stigma, self-doubt, or the pressure to appear fine, bottling everything up can make things even harder to cope with. Unfortunately, this causes some added struggles they probably never anticipated.
1. They feel isolated even when surrounded by people.
People who don’t open up about their mental health often feel a deep sense of loneliness. Even in a crowded room or among friends, they might feel disconnected, as if no one really understands what they’re going through. The effort to mask their struggles can create a barrier between themselves and other people. Sadly, that isolation often stems from the belief that sharing would lead to judgement or rejection. But the truth is, opening up, even to just one person they trust, can break that feeling of being completely alone and make a huge difference.
2. They put on a “happy face” that drains their energy.
Keeping up appearances when you’re struggling inside takes an enormous amount of energy. For many, pretending everything is fine becomes second nature, but it can leave them feeling utterly exhausted by the end of the day. Their emotional masking can make it harder to relax or recharge, as the constant performance of being “okay” doesn’t allow them the space to process or heal. Dropping the act, even in small, safe spaces, can be a relief they didn’t realise they needed.
3. They feel like they’re the only one struggling.
When someone hides their mental health struggles, it’s easy to believe they’re the only one dealing with these challenges. Seeing other people seeming happy and successful can reinforce the idea that everyone else has their life together, which can make their own struggles feel even worse. In reality, mental health struggles are far more common than people realise. Knowing they’re not alone — and hearing everyone else share their own experiences — can provide a much-needed sense of connection and understanding.
4. They blame themselves for feeling the way they do.
When mental health takes a dip, self-blame often follows. People may think, “I shouldn’t feel like this,” or, “If I were stronger, I’d be fine.” That internal dialogue can become a vicious cycle, making it even harder to reach out for support. Acknowledging that mental health challenges aren’t a personal failure, but a normal part of life can help change the way they think. It’s important to remember that asking for help isn’t a sign of weakness in any way. In fact, it’s actually a step toward strength and healing.
5. They struggle to focus or make decisions.
Mental health struggles can cloud judgement and make even small decisions feel overwhelming. For someone hiding their struggles, the added effort of appearing fine can amplify their mental fatigue, leaving them feeling scattered or stuck. Being open about how they’re feeling can help lighten the mental load. Whether it’s delegating tasks or simply letting someone know they’re overwhelmed, sharing the burden often brings clarity and relief.
6. They overcompensate by being overly busy.
Many people who are scared to admit their mental health is suffering throw themselves into work or activities as a distraction. Staying busy becomes a way to avoid confronting their feelings, but it can lead to burnout and leave them feeling even more disconnected. Slowing down and creating space for self-reflection can be uncomfortable at first, but it’s often what’s needed to address what’s really going on. Taking even small breaks to acknowledge their feelings can prevent the cycle of overworking and burnout.
7. They struggle to accept help, even when it’s offered.
For someone afraid to admit their mental health is suffering, accepting help can feel just as hard as asking for it. They might brush off offers of support with phrases like, “I’m fine” or, “I’ve got it under control,” even when they’re barely holding on. Recognising that help isn’t a sign of failure, but a form of connection can be a game-changer. Accepting support, whether it’s a listening ear, practical help, or professional guidance, can ease the burden they’re carrying alone.
8. They feel guilty for prioritising their own needs.
When someone is scared to admit their mental health struggles, they often feel guilty about taking time for themselves. They might prioritise everyone else’s needs or responsibilities over their own, leaving little room to address what they’re going through. Learning to prioritise self-care without guilt is key. Whether it’s taking a break, saying no, or setting boundaries, making their well-being a priority can help them feel more balanced and capable of handling life’s challenges.
9. They’re more irritable or easily overwhelmed.
When someone is bottling up their emotions, it often comes out in other ways, like irritability or feeling overwhelmed by small things. They may snap at loved ones or feel inexplicably frustrated, which only adds to their guilt and stress. Recognising these moments as signs of deeper struggles can help them find healthier outlets for their emotions. Journaling, talking to a trusted friend, or even just taking a walk can create a sense of release and relief.
10. They avoid situations that might make them emotional.
Whether it’s a movie that hits too close to home or a conversation about mental health, avoidance becomes a coping mechanism for those who fear confronting their feelings. Their emotional avoidance can make them feel safer in the moment, but often prevents long-term healing. Finding small, manageable ways to face these emotions — for example, watching something cathartic or starting a relaxed conversation — can help them build emotional resilience. It’s a gradual process, but each step makes facing emotions less daunting.
11. They rely heavily on humour to deflect.
Humour can be a great coping tool, but for someone hiding their mental health struggles, it often becomes a way to deflect attention. Joking about their feelings or making light of serious topics can mask what’s really going on beneath the surface. While humour can help lighten the load, it’s important to balance it with moments of honesty. Opening up about their struggles, even in a small way, can make their relationships feel more genuine and supportive.
12. They’re overly critical of themselves.
When someone’s mental health is suffering, their inner critic often gets louder. They may focus on perceived flaws or failures, constantly judging themselves more harshly than they would anyone else. All that self-criticism can become exhausting and deeply damaging over time. Being nicer to themselves, like speaking to themselves as they would to a friend, can help quiet their inner critic. Small shifts in how they talk to themselves can lead to big changes in how they feel.
13. They struggle with sleep issues.
Whether it’s lying awake replaying the day or waking up feeling drained despite a full night’s sleep, mental health struggles often show up in sleep patterns. For someone scared to admit they’re struggling, the lack of rest can make everything else feel harder. Adopting small bedtime routines, whether that’s limiting screen time or practising relaxation techniques, can help improve sleep quality. Addressing the underlying emotional struggles, however, is key to finding long-term relief.
14. They feel stuck but don’t know where to start.
Hiding mental health struggles often leads to feeling trapped in a cycle of inaction. They may recognise something’s wrong but feel too overwhelmed to figure out how to address it. The sense of being stuck can create even more frustration and hopelessness. Breaking things down into small, manageable steps — reaching out to a friend or scheduling one therapy session, for instance — can help them build momentum. Every small action is a step toward regaining control and feeling better.
15. They feel like admitting it will change how people see them.
The fear of being judged or treated differently often stops people from speaking up about their mental health. They may worry that people will see them as weak or incapable, which can reinforce their decision to keep quiet. It’s worth remembering that the people who truly care about them are likely to offer compassion and support, not judgement. Sharing their struggles can often strengthen relationships rather than harm them, creating a foundation of trust and understanding.
