Growing up poor shapes you in ways that stick with you long after you grow up and your circumstances change.
Not having money for basic necessities at times, let alone little luxuries, and watching your parent struggle to make ends meet has a profound effect on the type of person you become and the way you see the world. These patterns aren’t good or bad — they’re just part of your story, and understanding them can help you grow.
1. You feel guilty whenever you spend money.
Source: Unsplash Even when the bank account is healthy, buying something nice can trigger waves of guilt. That voice in your head questions every purchase that isn’t strictly necessary. The fear of returning to scarcity makes it hard to enjoy financial stability. Learning to separate past struggles from present reality can help create a healthier relationship with money, but that’s easier said than done at times.
2. You tend to stockpile the necessities.
Source: Unsplash Having multiple backup supplies of everything from toilet rolls to canned goods feels deeply comforting. Running out of essentials triggers memories of times when replacements weren’t guaranteed. This habit comes from a place of protecting yourself, but it’s worth examining if it’s still serving you or just taking up space in your life.
3. You find it hard to throw things away.
When you grew up making everything last, tossing anything usable feels wrong. That broken appliance might be fixed someday, those old clothes might come in handy. The scarcity mindset runs deep, making it hard to distinguish between genuine reuse and clinging to things you don’t need. Creating clear guidelines about what’s worth keeping helps break this cycle.
4. You always have an escape plan.
There’s a constant awareness of how quickly things can fall apart, leading to always having a backup plan ready. Every situation gets assessed for potential risks and exits. While being prepared isn’t bad, constantly waiting for disaster makes it hard to fully engage with the present moment. Building trust in your ability to handle challenges as they come can help ease this vigilance.
5. You tend to be overly independent.
When nobody could help during childhood, you learned to handle everything alone. Asking for support feels uncomfortable or even shameful. The self-reliance that helped you survive might now be keeping people at arm’s length. Recognising that interdependence is strength, not weakness, opens doors to deeper connections.
6. You have an intense awareness of money.
You notice every price change at the grocery store and can calculate a running total while shopping without thinking. The cost of everything registers automatically, even when you’re not actively budgeting. Money occupies constant mental space. While this awareness can be helpful, learning to loosen its grip on your attention creates more mental freedom.
7. You hoard food.
Having a fully stocked kitchen feels like security, even if you live alone. The sight of an empty fridge can trigger genuine anxiety. You might find yourself buying extra just in case, or feeling uneasy when food supplies run low. Understanding that this comes from past scarcity helps develop healthier food relationships.
8. You have strong empathy for people’s struggles.
Having lived through hardship creates a deep understanding of other people’s struggles. You notice when someone’s stretching their last dollars or trying to hide their situation. This sensitivity makes you quick to help without judgment. This empathy is a genuine strength, especially when balanced with boundaries.
9. You find it nearly impossible to relax.
Rest often feels unproductive or wasteful, like you should always be doing something useful. Time spent not working or being productive can trigger guilt. The constant drive that helped you survive might now be preventing necessary downtime. Learning that rest is productive helps break this pattern.
10. You show resourcefulness under pressure.
You can stretch resources and find creative solutions in tight situations. Problem-solving becomes second nature when you’ve had to make do with less. This ability to adapt and overcome serves well in many life situations. Seeing this as a strength rather than just a survival skill can really build confidence.
11. You have hidden knowledge gaps you were never even aware of.
Missing out on certain experiences or opportunities during childhood created gaps in knowledge that sometimes surface unexpectedly. Things other people take for granted might be unfamiliar territory. These gaps aren’t personal failures — they’re just areas for growth. Being open about learning new things helps fill these spaces.
12. You have a deep appreciation for stability.
Having reliable housing, steady income, or consistent meals never feels ordinary. Small comforts carry special meaning when you remember going without. This appreciation adds richness to life, though balancing it with allowing yourself to want more can be tricky.
13. You approach friendship a bit differently to other people.
Childhood friendships might have been limited by circumstances, leading to careful approaches to relationships now. You might find yourself drawn to people who understand struggle or feel uncomfortable in certain social situations. Building connections with people who share your values, regardless of background, creates meaningful relationships.
14. You have an extremely strong work ethic.
Hard work feels like the only reliable path to security when you’ve seen how fragile circumstances can be. You might take on extra responsibilities or struggle to slow down even when it’s safe to do so. While this drive has value, learning to pace yourself prevents burnout and allows for sustainable success.
