People who lack social skills aren’t bad people, but they do lack a certain level of understanding about their fellow human beings.
They struggle so much in social situations because they’re just not as attuned to interaction as other people are. Here are some of the things they don’t “get” that can really hold them back in life.
1. They don’t pick up on body language.
Body language is like an unspoken language that most people understand without thinking, but for those lacking social skills, it’s a complete mystery. They might miss the signals when someone’s ready to wrap up a conversation or fail to notice when they’re standing way too close. It’s not intentional — they just don’t see the signs that would tell them to adjust their behaviour. As a result, their interactions can come across as awkward or even invasive, even if that’s not their goal.
2. They interrupt conversations constantly.
For most of us, conversation is a give-and-take, but people with poor social skills often struggle with timing. They’ll cut people off mid-sentence, derail a conversation, or suddenly start talking about themselves when someone else is sharing something important. It’s not that they mean to be rude — they just don’t realise that conversations need a rhythm.
3. They overshare personal information.
There’s a fine line between being open and oversharing, and people with weak social skills often bulldoze right over that line. They might tell someone they’ve just met their entire life story or dive into intimate details that are way too much for casual conversation. While their openness might come from a good place, it can make people feel uncomfortable or overwhelmed, especially when trust hasn’t been built yet. It’s important to know when to hold back a little.
4. They don’t understand sarcasm or subtle humour.
Sarcasm and subtle jokes can go right over their heads. Where other people might laugh at a witty comment, they could take it literally and be left confused or out of the loop. This can lead to awkward moments where they’re left wondering why everyone else is laughing while they’re missing the punchline. It’s not that they lack a sense of humour — they just don’t pick up on the subtleties that make sarcasm and dry wit so effective.
5. They dominate conversations.
Some people don’t realise when they’ve turned a conversation into a monologue. They’ll go on and on about their interests or problems, barely giving anyone else a chance to get a word in. It’s not that they don’t care about what other people have to say — they just get so caught up in their own thoughts that they don’t notice when the other person is losing interest or trying to switch the subject.
6. They miss social cues about appropriate topics.
Knowing what’s okay to talk about and when is key to social interaction, but this is a major blind spot for people with poor social skills. They might dive into heavy or controversial topics in situations where it’s really not appropriate, like bringing up politics at a casual gathering or sharing personal medical details with acquaintances. They don’t intend to make people uncomfortable, but they’re missing the cues that most of us pick up on automatically.
7. They don’t understand the concept of personal space.
Personal space is something most people respect without thinking, but for those lacking in social awareness, it’s often a blind spot. They might stand too close, touch someone’s arm when it’s not welcomed, or lean in way too much during conversations. It’s not that they’re trying to make anyone uncomfortable — they just don’t realise that people need their space.
8. They fail to recognise when someone is uncomfortable.
Most people can sense when they’ve made someone uneasy, but for those with poor social skills, this awareness just isn’t there. They’ll keep talking about something uncomfortable or linger in a conversation long after the other person has made it clear they’re ready to leave. It’s not intentional, but it can make their interactions feel forced or awkward, leaving the other person desperate for an escape.
9. They don’t understand the importance of eye contact.
Eye contact is a key part of communication, but it’s something that people with social difficulties often struggle with. They might avoid it altogether, making them seem distant or uninterested, or they might overcompensate by staring too intensely, which can be unsettling. Finding the right balance can be tough, but it’s essential for making people feel seen and understood.
10. They don’t realise when they’re being too loud.
Source: Unsplash Volume control is another tricky area. Someone with weak social skills might speak way too loudly in quiet settings, or they might be too quiet when they need to project. They don’t pick up on the cues that tell them when to adjust their voice to fit the environment, which can lead to awkward moments where they accidentally disrupt the space or aren’t heard at all.
11. They don’t understand the concept of turn-taking in conversations.
Source: Unsplash In a healthy conversation, each person takes turns talking and listening. But people who struggle socially often don’t grasp this balance. They might interrupt frequently or dominate the discussion without giving anyone else a chance to contribute. It’s not that they’re trying to hog the spotlight — they just don’t realise that conversation is about sharing the floor, not holding it all for themselves.
12. They fail to pick up on when someone is not interested.
It’s easy to tell when someone isn’t interested in what you’re saying — unless you struggle with social skills. These individuals often miss the signals that it’s time to change the subject or wrap up the conversation. They don’t see the yawns, the sideways glances, or the subtle cues that the other person is bored or ready to move on.
13. They don’t understand the importance of context.
What’s appropriate in one situation might not be in another, but this distinction can be lost on people with poor social awareness. They might use slang at work, or be overly formal with friends. They don’t pick up on the social norms that help us adjust our behaviour to fit different contexts, which can leave them coming across as out of place or awkward.
14. They don’t realise when they’re being offensive.
Sometimes, people with poor social skills say things that are hurtful or inappropriate without realising it. They might make an insensitive joke or use a term that’s outdated or offensive, simply because they’re not tuned into the nuances of social interaction. It’s not that they want to offend — they just don’t understand the full impact of their words.
15. They don’t get the importance of reciprocity in relationships.
Source: Unsplash Friendships and relationships are about give and take, but people with social difficulties often struggle with this concept. They might always expect everyone to help them out without offering support in return, or they’ll lean heavily on friends but never check in when the tables are turned. They don’t see that healthy relationships need balance, and this can lead to frustration on the part of their friends or partners.
