Playing hard to get is the oldest dating game in the world, but once you reach a certain age, it gets a bit… obnoxious.
Sure, it’s good to be a little mysterious and leave the other person wanting more, but acting aloof or playing hot and cold to get and keep their interest is immature and frankly, more than a little off-putting. So, how do you know if someone is doing the whole hard to get thing? Keep an ear (and eye) out for these phrases.
1. They’ll say they’re “really busy right now”.
Source: Unsplash This classic line keeps you interested while giving them an easy out. They’re hinting that they might have time for you… eventually. It’s a way of saying “not now” without completely shutting the door on future possibilities.
2. “I’m not looking for anything serious at the moment”.
Source: Unsplash By saying this, they’re trying to lower your expectations while still keeping you around. It’s a clever way of maintaining distance while leaving the door open for casual chats/hangouts (and maybe even physical intimacy). They’re hoping you’ll stick around despite the lack of commitment.
3. “We should hang out sometime”.
This vague suggestion of future plans is classic hard-to-get behaviour. They’re showing interest without actually committing to anything concrete. It keeps you hopeful but doesn’t require them to follow through anytime soon.
4. “I’ll let you know”.
When you suggest plans, this non-committal response keeps you guessing. They’re not saying no, but they’re certainly not saying yes either. It’s a holding pattern that keeps you interested while they decide if they want to engage.
5. “I’m still figuring things out”.
Source: Unsplash This line suggests they’re not quite ready for a relationship, but they might be… someday. It’s a way of keeping you on the hook while they maintain their independence. They’re asking for patience without promising anything in return.
6. “You’re not like anyone I’ve met before”.
Source: Unsplash This compliment feels special, but it’s often used to keep you intrigued without committing. They’re acknowledging your uniqueness while staying safely noncommittal. It’s flattering enough to keep you interested, but vague enough to avoid real vulnerability.
7. “I had a great time, I’ll text you”.
Source: Unsplash After a date or hangout, this line keeps you waiting by their phone. They’re showing just enough interest to keep you hopeful, but not making any real promises. It puts the ball in their court for future communication.
8. “I’m not sure I’m ready for a relationship”.
Source: Unsplash This statement creates distance while still leaving room for possibility. They’re hinting that they might be ready… eventually. It’s a way of managing your expectations while keeping you interested in case they change their mind.
9. “You deserve someone better than me”.
Source: Unsplash This self-deprecating line is often used to push you away while simultaneously making you want to prove them wrong. It’s a subtle form of manipulation that can keep you trying to win their affection.
10. “I like you, but…”.
Source: Unsplash The “but” in this sentence negates the positive sentiment that came before it. They’re acknowledging your connection while creating a barrier. It’s a way of keeping you interested while maintaining emotional distance.
11. “Let’s just see where this goes”.
Source: Unsplash This noncommittal message avoids defining the relationship while keeping options open. They’re suggesting potential without promising anything. It’s a way of staying in control while keeping you guessing about their true intentions.
12. “I’m not good at texting”.
Source: Unsplash This excuse explains away their lack of communication without taking responsibility for it. They’re setting low expectations for their responsiveness while hoping you’ll stick around despite the minimal effort.
13. “I don’t want to ruin our friendship”.
Source: Unsplash By framing your relationship as a friendship they don’t want to lose, they’re creating a reason to keep things casual. It’s a way of acknowledging your connection while avoiding deeper commitment.
14. “I’m just focused on my career right now”.
Source: Unsplash This line suggests that you’re competing with their professional goals for attention. They’re hinting that they might have time for you… once they’ve achieved certain milestones. It keeps you waiting in the wings indefinitely.
15. “I’m not sure what I want”.
Source: Unsplash This statement keeps things ambiguous. They’re admitting to uncertainty, which can make you want to stick around and help them figure it out. It’s a way of avoiding commitment while keeping you engaged in their personal journey.
16. “We should take things slow”.
Source: Unsplash While this can be a healthy approach, it’s often used as a stalling tactic. They’re pumping the brakes on the relationship’s progression while still keeping you interested. It allows them to control the pace and maintain emotional distance.
17. “I’m not like other girls/guys”.
Source: Unsplash This line is meant to make you feel special for catching their attention. They’re setting themselves apart, suggesting that normal rules don’t apply to them. It’s a way of justifying their hard-to-get behaviour while keeping you intrigued.
