Not everyone is great with words — some people find it easier to express their true feelings via their actions. While that’s okay, sometimes it’s frustrating for those who need verbal affirmation that someone cares about them. If you’re seeing someone who’s the strong, silent type, here’s how you know that they really do like you (and maybe even love you!) a lot.
1. They actually tune in and listen when you speak.
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When you’re talking, they’re not just waiting for their turn to chime in. They put down their phone, make eye contact, and really focus on what you’re saying. They ask questions, remember details, and bring up things you mentioned in previous conversations. This shows that they value your thoughts and opinions and want to understand where you’re coming from. Active listening is a powerful way to demonstrate care and respect, and it’s a skill that not everyone possesses.
2. They remember the little things that matter to you.
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They know how you take your coffee, what your favorite band is, and that you hate cilantro. They remember the name of your childhood pet and the anniversary of your dad’s passing. These small details may seem insignificant, but they show that the person pays attention to what’s important to you and makes an effort to remember it. When someone takes the time to learn and remember the little things that make you tick, it’s a clear sign that they care about you and value your presence in their life.
3. They show up when you need them, even if it’s inconvenient.
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When you’re going through a tough time or need a favor, they’re there for you, no questions asked. They’ll drive across town to pick you up when your car breaks down, help you move on a Saturday morning, or sit with you in the hospital waiting room. They prioritize your needs and well-being, even when it’s not easy or convenient for them. This kind of dependability and selflessness is a hallmark of someone who truly cares about you.
4. They call you out when you’re being self-destructive.
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They’re not afraid to tell you hard truths when you need to hear them. If you’re engaging in behavior that’s harmful to yourself or others, they’ll call you out on it, even if it means risking your anger or defensiveness. They do this not to judge or control you, but because they genuinely want what’s best for you. They know that sometimes being a good friend means having difficult conversations and pushing you to be your best self.
5. They respect your boundaries and autonomy.
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They don’t try to control or manipulate you, even if they disagree with your choices. They respect your right to make your own decisions and live your life on your own terms. They don’t pressure you to change who you are or conform to their expectations. Instead, they support your individuality and encourage you to be true to yourself. This kind of respect and acceptance is a key component of any healthy, caring relationship.
6. They make an effort to include you in their life.
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They invite you to family gatherings, include you in their social plans, and introduce you to their friends. They make it clear that you’re an important part of their life and that they want you to be involved in the things that matter to them. This kind of inclusion shows that they value your presence and want to integrate you into their world. It’s a sign that they see you as more than just a casual acquaintance or fair-weather friend.
7. They go out of their way to make you feel special.
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They surprise you with your favorite dessert, leave encouraging notes on your desk, or plan a thoughtful outing for your birthday. They go above and beyond to make you feel appreciated and celebrated. These gestures don’t have to be grand or expensive, but they show that the person is thinking about you and wants to bring a smile to your face. When someone consistently puts in the effort to make you feel special, it’s a clear indication that they care deeply about you.
8. They’re honest with you, even when it’s uncomfortable.
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They tell you the truth, even when it’s not what you want to hear. If you ask for their opinion, they give it to you straight, without sugarcoating or hedging. They’re not afraid to disagree with you or challenge your assumptions, because they know that honesty is essential for any meaningful relationship. This kind of candor can be uncomfortable at times, but it’s a sign of genuine care and respect. Someone who truly cares about you will prioritize your growth and well-being over your temporary comfort.
9. They make time for you, even when they’re busy.
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They carve out space in their schedule to spend quality time with you, even when they have a million other things going on. They make you a priority and don’t consistently cancel or reschedule plans with you. When you’re together, they’re fully present and engaged, not distracted or rushing off to the next thing. This kind of undivided attention and commitment is a clear sign that you’re a top priority in their life.
10. They support your dreams and passions.
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They genuinely want to see you succeed and are your biggest cheerleader when you’re pursuing your goals. They listen to you talk about your aspirations and offer encouragement and practical support. They don’t try to discourage you or talk you out of taking risks because they believe in your abilities and want to see you thrive. This kind of unwavering support is a hallmark of someone who truly cares about your happiness and fulfillment.
11. They’re patient and understanding when you’re struggling.
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They don’t judge or criticize you when you’re going through a hard time. They’re patient and understanding when you’re not at your best, and they don’t take your struggles personally. They offer a listening ear, a shoulder to cry on, and practical help when you need it. They recognize that life is full of ups and downs and that supporting someone through the tough times is an essential part of caring for them.
12. They make an effort to resolve conflicts and misunderstandings.
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They don’t just sweep problems under the rug or give you the silent treatment when things get tough. They’re willing to have difficult conversations and work through conflicts in a healthy, productive way. They take responsibility for their actions and apologize when they’ve done something wrong. They don’t hold grudges or bring up past mistakes in arguments. This kind of emotional maturity and commitment to communication is a sign of true care and respect.
