Ever notice how some people seem completely oblivious to how their actions affect people? Maybe they’re always late, never apologise, or constantly interrupt you. It’s like they’re living in their own little world, with no clue how they come across to other people. If you’ve encountered folks like this, chances are they lack self-awareness. Their words often give them away. Here are some common things you’ll hear them say.
1. “I’m always brutally honest.”
This is usually code for “I say whatever I want, regardless of how hurtful it is.” While honesty is important, there’s a difference between being truthful and being tactless. People who lack self-awareness often use “brutal honesty” as an excuse for their insensitivity and lack of consideration for other people’s feelings.
2. “I don’t sugar coat things.”
Similar to the first phrase, this one often translates to “I’m not going to bother filtering my thoughts or considering how my words might affect you.” While directness can be a virtue, it’s important to be mindful of your delivery and choose your words carefully, especially when dealing with sensitive topics.
3. “I tell it like it is.”
This is another phrase that’s often used to justify bluntness or insensitivity. While it’s important to be honest, there’s a way to do it without being hurtful or dismissive. People who lack self-awareness often fail to recognise the impact of their words on other people and might come across as harsh or abrasive.
4. “I’m just a very direct person.”
Directness can be a positive trait, but it can also be a sign of a lack of social awareness. People who are overly direct might blurt out their thoughts without considering the context or other people’s feelings. This can lead to misunderstandings, hurt feelings, and damaged relationships.
5. “People are too sensitive these days.”
This phrase is often used to dismiss or invalidate people’s feelings. It’s a way of deflecting responsibility for their own insensitivity or lack of empathy. People who lack self-awareness might not realise how their words and actions affect people, and might blame them for being “too sensitive” instead of examining their own behaviour.
6. “I can’t help it, that’s just how I am.”
This phrase suggests a lack of willingness to change or grow. Self-awareness is a journey, and we can all work to improve our social skills and emotional intelligence. People who refuse to acknowledge their shortcomings or take responsibility for their actions are unlikely to make positive changes in their behaviour.
7. “I don’t understand why people are always so offended by me.”
This phrase reveals a lack of understanding of how what they say and do affects the people around them. They might be genuinely confused by the reactions they receive, but instead of trying to understand why people are offended, they simply dismiss their feelings or blame them for being too sensitive.
8. “I’m not a people person.”
While it’s true that some people are naturally more introverted or prefer solitude, this phrase can sometimes be used as an excuse for a lack of social skills. It can also be a way of avoiding social interaction or putting in the effort to connect with people.
9. “I just keep it real.”
While authenticity is important, this phrase often masks a lack of tact or consideration for other people’s feelings. It’s a way of saying, “I’m not going to filter my thoughts or sugar coat anything, even if it hurts you.” True authenticity involves expressing your thoughts and feelings honestly, while also being mindful of the impact your words have on others.
10. “Everyone else is the problem.”
People who lack self-awareness often have difficulty recognising their own role in conflicts or misunderstandings. They tend to blame people for their problems and refuse to take responsibility for their actions. This externalisation of blame can hinder personal growth and prevent them from learning from their mistakes.
11. “I’m not dramatic, you’re just overreacting.”
This phrase is often used to invalidate or dismiss people’s feelings. It’s a way of minimising their emotions and making them feel like they’re being unreasonable. People who lack self-awareness might not realise how their actions are affecting people and might try to shift the blame onto them instead.
12. “I know I’m right.”
While confidence is a good thing, overconfidence can be a sign of a lack of self-awareness. People who always believe they’re right might be closed-minded and unwilling to consider other perspectives. This can hinder their ability to learn and grow, as well as strain their relationships.
13. “I’m always the victim.”
People who lack self-awareness often adopt a victim mentality, blaming external factors or other people for their problems. They might refuse to take responsibility for their actions and see themselves as powerless to change their circumstances. This can prevent them from moving forward and finding solutions to their problems.
14. “I never get anything right.”
While self-deprecating humour can be endearing in moderation, constantly putting yourself down can be a sign of low self-esteem and a lack of self-awareness, Verywell Mind notes. It’s important to recognise your strengths and accomplishments, and not to dwell on your perceived shortcomings. A healthy dose of self-compassion can go a long way in improving your self-perception and overall well-being.
15. “I don’t need to change.”
This statement reveals a lack of willingness to grow or self-reflect. Everyone has room for improvement, and being open to feedback and self-evaluation is a sign of maturity. Refusing to acknowledge one’s flaws or shortcomings can hinder personal growth and prevent them from reaching their full potential.
