For many autistic people, language isn’t just about tone or intention; it’s also about what the words actually mean.
So when someone uses vague, abstract, or figurative language, it can easily lead to confusion, anxiety, or frustration. A lot of times, the issue isn’t comprehension, but interpretation. A phrase that sounds like a throwaway line to one person might be taken at full face value by someone with a literal processing style. Here are some common phrases that autistic people may take literally, and why clearer communication is so important for people with this form of neurodivergence.
1. “Give me a second.”
This can be taken to mean exactly one second, which obviously never matches the speaker’s actual meaning. For someone who processes time literally, the lack of follow-through after one second can feel like a broken promise or just plain confusing. A clearer option would be saying “Just a moment” or “I’ll be with you shortly,” which leaves space for slight delay without suggesting an exact time frame. You don’t have to over-explain, but it’s important to align language with reality.
2. “Hold your horses.”
This is the kind of idiom that means nothing without context unless you already know it’s just a quirky way to say “wait.” For someone who interprets language literally, being told to hold imaginary horses can feel bizarre and irritating. It’s especially tricky when the speaker expects it to be understood because “everyone says it.” Replacing it with something more direct, like “Please wait a minute,” avoids unnecessary confusion and keeps the conversation grounded.
3. “We’ll see.”
This one can be incredibly frustrating. Autistic people might take this at face value and assume a decision will actually be made or followed up later. However, more often than not, this phrase is used to end a conversation without committing to anything. The vagueness can feel like avoidance or even dishonesty. If the answer is more of a no or a not right now, it’s usually better to say so gently, rather than leaving someone hanging with a vague placeholder.
4. “It’s not rocket science.”
This is often used to imply something is easy, but if you take it literally, it sounds like you’re suddenly comparing a simple task to building spacecraft. The disconnect between tone and wording can throw off understanding completely. It’s clearer to just say, “It’s not too difficult,” or “It’s pretty straightforward.” There’s no need for space-related metaphors when a direct explanation gets the point across faster and more clearly.
5. “I could eat a horse.”
Even neurotypical people know this isn’t meant to be literal, but for someone who processes words exactly as they’re said, the image is not only off-putting, it’s baffling. It can make them question whether you’re being serious or just being weird. Try something like “I’m really hungry” instead. Simple language avoids the mental gymnastics and keeps the message clear without needing to decode it for tone or exaggeration.
6. “Pull yourself together.”
This is often said during moments when someone is spiralling, but for a person with autism, who may already be overwhelmed, hearing this can sound absurd or even invalidating. Are they meant to physically pull parts of themselves together? Even if it’s well-intended, it can sound like criticism. It’s much more helpful to say, “Take your time, I’m here,” or “Let’s figure this out together.” Support shouldn’t sound like a demand.
7. “Break a leg.”
To someone unfamiliar with performance slang, this sounds cruel or threatening. For a person who takes language at face value, being told to break a body part before doing something important makes zero sense. If encouragement is the goal, it’s more helpful to say something like, “Good luck, you’ve got this.” Encouragement doesn’t need to come wrapped in sarcasm or coded language to be meaningful.
8. “The early bird gets the worm.”
While this one has a clear meaning once explained, hearing it without context can create a strange visual or raise questions like, “Why would I want a worm?” That literal interpretation makes the original intent harder to grasp. Swapping it out for “Getting up early gives you a head start” can land much more smoothly. The core idea stays the same, just without relying on metaphors to do the heavy lifting.
9. “I’m just pulling your leg.”
Unless the person knows this means “joking,” the phrase can sound physically threatening or downright confusing. Why would someone pull your leg to joke around? It doesn’t translate well unless you already know the slang. If you’ve made a joke, it’s fine to just say, “I’m only joking” or “I didn’t mean that seriously.” Clear humour is still funny. It just doesn’t leave someone wondering if you’re being weird or rude.
10. “Let’s play it by ear.”
This phrase can be hard to visualise, let alone understand. Taken literally, it sounds like something involving music, instruments, or listening, none of which have anything to do with what’s actually being planned. When plans are already tricky for someone who thrives on routine or structure, this kind of vagueness adds stress. Saying “We’ll decide as we go” or “Let’s stay flexible and see what works” makes the same point, just without the ambiguity.
11. “Don’t get cold feet.”
Without knowing it means “don’t back out,” this phrase could raise questions about temperature, socks, or whether someone is actually concerned about your toes. Again, it’s all about context and clarity. For someone literal-minded, encouragement to follow through works better when it’s said plainly, like “It’s okay to be nervous, but you’re ready” or “Stick with it, you can do this.” That feels more supportive and a lot less confusing.
12. “You’re walking on thin ice.”
This can sound like a physical threat or warning, especially if the person isn’t familiar with idioms. They might be wondering when they went near ice, or how they’re supposed to interpret it in the current conversation. Instead of dramatic metaphors, a clearer message would be, “Be careful, this is a sensitive topic,” or “You’re pushing the limit here.” That removes the guesswork without dulling the message.
13. “Keep an eye on it.”
This one might literally be taken as needing to stare at something or not look away. For someone processing speech in a more concrete way, it’s a strange ask unless it’s explained further. If you mean monitor it or check in regularly, just say that. “Watch it for me” or “Let me know if anything changes” are more direct and reduce the chances of this one being misread entirely.
14. “It’s raining cats and dogs.”
Most kids find this phrase confusing the first time they hear it, but for autistic people, that confusion can stick around much longer. The mental image of animals falling from the sky can be distracting or even distressing. Just saying “It’s raining really heavily” does the job without the weird visuals. Figurative speech isn’t wrong. It just doesn’t always come across the same way for everyone.
15. “I’m dying of laughter.”
Jokes about dying, even playfully, can be alarming to someone who interprets words literally. If someone doesn’t realise it’s an exaggeration, they might take it seriously or feel emotionally thrown off by the contradiction. Saying “That was hilarious” or “I can’t stop laughing” gets the same tone across, just without using extreme or emotionally loaded language that can cause misunderstandings.
16. “Don’t be such a baby.”
Besides being dismissive, this kind of phrase can be interpreted literally and hurtfully. Autistic people often value clarity and fairness, so being called a baby can feel insulting and unclear at the same time. If someone’s struggling emotionally, a better approach is to ask what they need or give space. Clear, respectful language helps more than sarcasm or belittling metaphors ever could.
