Phrases That Instantly Make You Sound More Understanding
Yuri Arcurs peopleimages.com Empathy is about more than just putting yourself in someone else’s shoes. It’s the ability to connect with their emotions and make them feel truly heard and understood. During difficult conversations or moments when someone needs support, choosing the right words can make a world of difference. These simple phrases communicate compassion, build trust, and foster a safe space for open communication, strengthening your relationships.
1. “That sounds really tough.”
This is simple but it validates the other person’s experience without offering unsolicited advice or trying to minimize their feelings. You’re acknowledging the struggle, which in itself can feel incredibly validating. It also leaves room for them to elaborate without feeling pressured to sugar coat things.
2. “I can’t imagine how you must be feeling, but I’m here for you.”
This is a great way of striking a balance between acknowledging that you can’t fully understand their experience, while simultaneously showing that you support them. It avoids those obnoxious (and completely unhelpful) platitudes and also makes sure the focus stays on them and how they’re feeling.
3. “Can you tell me more about that?”
Showing genuine interest with an open-ended question encourages them to open up about what they’re really feeling. It also demonstrates active listening and a desire to grasp their perspective and the nuances of the situation. The more they share, the stronger the bond between you will be.
4. “It makes sense that you would feel that way.”
As Verywell Mind notes, validating someone’s feelings is powerful. Even if you don’t fully agree with their reaction, acknowledging that their feelings are understandable in context helps them feel seen. As a result, they’re less likely to feel defensive, and this creates a space for more open communication. It’s a win-win.
5. “I want to make sure I’m understanding you correctly.”
Paraphrasing back what you’re hearing, then following up with a clarifying question, makes sure you’re on the same page. It minimizes the chance of misunderstandings and shows you’re dedicated to truly listening and comprehending their POV, which builds trust and rapport.
6. “Take the time you need.”
If someone is overwhelmed or flustered, letting them know there’s no rush for answers or explanations can be really reassuring. This respects their emotional state and relieves pressure, creating a sense of safety and compassion.
7. “It’s okay if you don’t know what to say right now.”
During tough situations, sometimes people struggle to articulate their feelings or thoughts clearly. Letting them know there’s no pressure for immediately being able to express what they’re going through relieves anxiety and lets them know that you’ll be there when you’re ready to talk.
8. “What would be helpful for you right now?”
Instead of assuming you know what someone needs, ask! They may need practical support, an empathetic sounding board, or just a bit of space to process things. This approach empowers them, and helps you offer the kind of help that’s actually useful in that moment.
9. “I hear what you’re saying.”
This simple phrase shows that you’re not just passively listening, you’re actively absorbing the information. It emphasizes that their words matter, and you’re willing to hear them out before offering any opinions or solutions.
10. “I believe you.”
For someone who’s sharing a traumatic experience or opening up about something deeply personal, these three words hold a lot of power. Letting them know that you trust them and take their word seriously can be especially validating for people who have had their experiences doubted or dismissed in the past.
11. “This isn’t your fault.”
Source: Unsplash Survivors of abuse, trauma, or unfortunate circumstances often struggle with misplaced guilt or self-blame, BetterHelp explains. Offering this simple statement can be really comforting for a lot of people. It reminds them that external factors can be beyond their control, which might encourage them to be a bit kinder to themselves.
12. “I’m not going anywhere.”
Source: Unsplash Reassuring someone struggling that you’re by their side no matter what gives a sense of security and helps them feel less isolated. It also makes it clear that you won’t abandon them when things are tough and that you’re there to offer unconditional support.
13. “Is there anything I can do to help?”
Source: Unsplash A willingness to offer practical help, even in small ways, can ease a burden. Open-ended questions leave it up to them to specify what kind of help they’d like – maybe running errands, offering to babysit, or just being a nonjudgmental presence.
14. “You’re not alone in this.”
Source: Unsplash Going through tought times can feel isolating, and a lot of people end up suffering in silence. Reminding them that they have support, whether from you specifically or their wider group of friends and family, can fight that sense of loneliness. It encourages them to reach out for help when needed.
15. Silence and nonverbal cues are also powerful communication tools.
Source: Unsplash Sometimes, the most supportive thing is simply offering to be there. Making eye contact, giving a reassuring nod, or gently holding their hand shows that you’re there to listen without words. This is especially valuable for those who are overcome with emotion or unsure how to verbalize how they feel.
16. Offer resources (after asking if they’re open to it).
Source: Unsplash If a situation warrants external support, be thoughtful about how you bring it up. Rather than directly giving advice, ask something like, “Would it be helpful if I shared some resources that might offer support?” This respects their autonomy while giving them options.
17. “Thank you for sharing that with me.”
Source: Unsplash If someone has confided something vulnerable, expressing genuine gratitude for their trust strengthens the bond between you. It reinforces that you value openness and consider it an honour that they felt comfortable sharing with you.
